Ms. Know-it-All Falls for Mr. Knows-Nothing-at-All

Chapter 3

I never learned to trust boys. Even before high school, I have knowledge on how terrible boys can be. They are jerks, assholes, and dumbasses that only want big fronts and huge behinds.

Hindi ko talaga alam ano nangyari pero nakakalungkot isipin na sobrang nagbago na ang mundo. Those boys who had this honourable reputations throughout history turns out to be shitty and irrelevant nowadays.

Catcalling ng mga nagda-drive ng truck, makakita lang ng legs kahit pa hindi ka ganoon kaganda, basta makita lang na malaki ang hinaharap mo. Boys will ogle with their mouths drooling because of the hard-on they're enduring.

It is a sad thought when these same men will reason out that they ogle because of how girls will wear their outfits. Tingin ko may punto naman iyon, minsan kasi halos wala na ring suot ang mga kababaihan kung lumabas. But! If a man or a boy with good education and right character will see a girl almost naked, he won't have that maniacal stare.

It is not about the ladies' clothes, but about the man's nature. It is never about the clothes. If someone is already rotten in the inside, kahit gaano pa balutin ng babae ang sarili niya sa tela, babastusin at babastusin pa rin siya.

Minsan dissapointed din ako kay Charles Darwin dahil hindi niya na-predict na eto ang magiging Evolution of Man.

If only he'd known, maybe these creatures we call assholes wouldn't be much of a surprise.

Kaya hindi rin maaalis sa'kin ang maging ganito. Na kahit napakaraming lumalapit, wala pa rin akong mapili. Masyado nga daw akong maarte, pero bakit nga ba hindi ako hahanap ng maayos na lalaki para sa'kin?

They say that finding love is a voyage. I am finding the love I need, people must not give a shit. It is my journey, and mine alone.

I am cautious. Everytime that I will hear girls talking about the pain that their exes had brought into them, I can't help but shudder and be a little scared. Nakakatakot na pwede kang magpapasok ng isang tao sa buhay mo, na pwede nilang malaman ang lahat tungkol sa'yo pero sasaktan at iiwan ka pa rin sa huli.

I can't get it. Why do people enter our lives then leave us by ourselves? Kung kailan nasanay ka na, saka pa mawawala. Ang unfair doon sa maiiwan. That left behind would only have two choices: either to stay, or to wait for another someone to mend the pain.

People tend to be hurt when they love, and that's why I'm afraid to love someone. Ayokong magbigay ng pagkakataon sa ibang tao na saktan ako. I don't deserve any pain by another human being; by a boy.

I remember a few guys who courted me... who belong and can pass my standards. Kaso iba pa rin ang hinahanap ko. There's this something inside of me that keeps on nagging about finding a perfect guy.

Sadly, perfect does not exist.

Siguro dala na rin ng takot ko na masaktan. I am desperately finding for someone who won't give me pain in any form. I want someone who'll make love a common term, and pain a legendary word.

These thoughts had crossed my mind a thousand times, and I know that I'll be holding on to them as long as I live. Loving is just like this - having an idea and turning it into reality.

Tapos na ang discussion sa klase nang matapos din ako sa pag-iisip. Lilipat na kami ng room sa next class. Great! Ang dami kong natutunan!

Para ata akong zombie kung maglakad papunta sa locker ko. Iyon din kasi ang sinabi ni Ryan, kaklase kong malapit din sa akin. Binatukan niya kasi ako at inasar.