Walk on Water or Drown

Chapter Seven

'Did you see his face?' Stan laughed, walking next to Greg as they exited the pool hall. The sound of a thrashing Louis hitting the water ringing in their ears, the high of doing something completely outrageous and stupid and potentially dangerous yet thrilling at the same time coursing through their veins and pumping their hearts filled with adrenaline and hate, hate, hate.

Because that's what they were.

They were walking bags of hate. They were angry at the world, angry that they couldn't have what everyone else did, angry because they wanted something that they could never get, that Tomlinson and Styles had that they wouldn't ever had: someone to love. Or, at least Stan was angry- he didn't know about Greg. Greg never really felt anything at all, too mysterious and vague and completely lost in the fucking haze of fake stupidity that surrounded him for the sake of appearance.

Greg was nice, smart, kind, funny- to be honest he was perfect. But he and Stan had been friends since they were rolling around in diapers and throwing bowls filled with baby food from their high chairs to see who could make the bigger mess. So where Stan went, so did Greg, and when Stan got lost in the sea of growing up and having feelings and being alone, Greg sucked in a breath and waded in after him.

Stan, well- Stan was blind. Not literally, of course. But he always felt alone- too blind to see the boy who has been following him around for years, the boy who bends and breaks and moulds to whatever Stan wants, the boy who has been right by his side through the abandonment and the divorce and the breakups and the highs and the lows and the weed and the booze and the hookers and the cliques and the shitty grades and the fist fights and the bar crawls and the lonely nights spent in the park, drunk and talking philosophy and anthropology on the swings as they toss empty bottles of vodka as far as they can in their inebriated state for straight-laced suburban mothers to find with their children hours later when the sun came out to play.

And in that moment, their high comes crashing down because they go crashing into the one person they were trying to avoid.

Harry Styles.

They stop, their laughter stops, and they stop breathing. All is silent.

And then Harry hears it, and he's screaming and yelling and pushing them out of the way and running and trying to pull of his shoes without falling over and then he's diving into the pool.

All they can do is hold their breath, too scared and paralyzed and absolutely fucking terrified because scared is too tame a word to describe how they feel after seeing the frantic crazed worried absolutely in love look in Harry's forest green eyes as he's screaming Louis' name and diving into the pool fully-clothed.

And that sound breaks their heart.

The sound of Harry crying- gasping between breaths as he tries to give Louis mouth to mouth and revive him, of Harry's broken sobs and frantic shouts of Louis' name as he pounds on his chest, hissing the counts. One two three four five six seven eight nine ten.

And it goes on and on and one until he hits thirty and then he's sucking in air again and pressing his mouth to the blue eyed boy's and holding his nose and tipping his chin back to open his airways and then he's breathing.

Breathing life back into Louis because he needs him, because Harry is oh so lost without him and everything is falling apart and he can't help but think that its happening again and he doesn't understand why they just didn't stop after the first time because their positions are so familiar and all Harry can think about is the moment when Louis opens his eyes and smiles at him.

But that's not happening because Harry's too hoarse from screaming to call for help and he's immersing himself in the methodical repetition of thirty compressions and two breaths, concentrating on Louis, Louis, Louis  and praying that he'll just breathe, breathe, breathe because he can't take it anymore, he can't stand being this in love and this lonely when everything he wants is lying out before him  not breathing and he's trying as hard as he can to fix it but he just can't because nothing is like before: everything is different.

Harry isn't nine and Louis isn't ten.

They're not surrounded by frantic children screaming because they think someone is dying.

Harry isn't sure of himself, his cockiness is gone. Louis isn't oblivious to how he feels about Harry.

Everything is different, yet so eerily comfortable and the same.

There's silence for a moment, and everything is still like the world is holding it's breath and waiting for the right moment to exhale.

And then Louis is choking and gasping and his eyes are so wide and innocent and blue like deep pools of azure sea water in the Caribbean and Harry is chanting his name, whispering it softly into the air like a prayer. He rolls Louis on to his side and helps him clear the water from his lungs and he doesn't stop saying his name: Louis, Louis, Louis. He's pulling the older lad's body to his own, sitting him up and wrapping his arms around his shivering frame and rubbing reassuring circles on his back with his thumb and he still doesn't stop because all he can think about is: Louis, Louis, Louis.

Louis is crying, Harry is sobbing, and they're clinging to one another like they're the only people in the world and nothing else matters and all they need is love and everything is perfect.

Harry pulls away, touch lingering on Louis' chilled skin, and a smile graces is full cherry lips and his dimples make an appearance. And then he's laughing. Laughing and sobbing and shaking and crying and choking on air as he thinks of the ridiculousness of it all. He smiles, big and wide and toothy. And he relaxes because Louis is safe and Louis is his and they're in love.

Louis spits out a mouthful of chlorinated pool water and stares, looking at Harry with speculative eyes and an unreadable expression.

Harry stares back, eyes so light and happy and absolutely care free despite the fact that he just saved the love of his life for the second time.

'Is our entire relationship going to revolve around me saving you?' he asks playfully, and Louis shoves his shoulder before freezing.

And that's when Harry realizes that he's said too much.