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I sat in my now old, now empty, now cold bedroom. These new circumstances began a new, hopefully good, but guaranteed-to-be interesting, chaptet of my life. After graduating from a two year university, I decided to move, in with my long time boyfriend, to Seoul. As Jungkook had been an idol and was constantly busy with his work, moving in was the only way I could ever see him in person. So, we rented an apartment not far from his groups. When my mother found out, she immediately emptied my room and banned me from the house. She was currently on a 'personal vacation' in the Carribean, so I brought Jungkook to see what used to be my life.
"This feels so strange," I said as I looked around, gently tugging on my pajama shirt sleeves, balling the ends in my palms as I thought about the nearing changes.
"I know what you mean," Jungkook said.
"She threw me out," I finally told him. "Even though I decided to leave... she didn't let me say goodbye in my own time," I sighed and leaned against the wall.
"It's my fault," He instantly said, trying to take my hand.. but I refused.
"Yeah.. maybe," I said, but had instantly regretted it based on the look Jungkook gave me.
We often had petty arguments about his career. I kept telling myself that this was what he loved and that I could and would never ask him to stop doing it, but God, I hated it. I was often surprised we had made it 2 years, considering we hardly saw each other. I felt that as we aged things would get more frustrating and dramatic.
We even argued about it, but that had only been the past few months or so. It always happened in my.. well now my mom's house, because I never wanted the rest of Bangtan to know how I felt out of fear; I feared them would disapprove of the relationship I had with Jungkook while thinking I disapproved of their lifestyle. I just got selfish sometimes and didn't want to show those times to them.
Jungkook let out a deep sigh and sat up straight, staring down into his hands, before resting his head in his palms.
"What's that?" I asked, spotting a marking on his neck, just behind his ear. His hair fell out of place, revealing it. It didn't look fresh, and I figured he strategically put it where his hair or ear pieces could cover it.
"애인 ♡ 형제들" was inked down along the outline of his ear. He reached a hand back to his ear and he let out another, softer sigh.
"My reminder and my display of two of the most important things to me," He said, making eye contact. "You, and my group,"
I smiled, instantly feeling guilty for bringing up this issue yet again.
"I had no idea you were the tattoo type," I teased in attempt to lighten the mood.
"I felt I had to really prove to you how much this life meant to me,"
His words really hit me, really made me realize how selfish I had been. I could hear a strain in his voice that ripped my heart into pieces.
"Honey, I'm so sorry," I said and grabbed his hands, fiddling with his oversized pajama shirt.
"No, no," He started, but I interrupted.
"I have seen you put so much into this group. I've seen first hand what this group has done to and for you, and I know inside and out what this group means to you. I could never ask you to stop doing what you love. Trust me," I said. "This is a part of me now, it has been. It's changed me too. However annoying, I wouldn't want either of us to give up this lifestyle. Sorry, handsome, you're stuck with me. I'm gonna complain, but I hope you forgive me by remembering how tough it is to be so alone so often,"
"I've fallen in love again," Jungkook giggled, giving my forehead a light peck.
I pulled back, dropping my soft smile as I looked into his eyes. I knew he was to leave soon after we officially settled into our new home, and I had been struggling with the idea. I could say I understood, but I had to convince him I really didn't mind. He didn't look to believe me. His face softened, and he pulled me into a tight hug. I rested my chin on his shoulder, charishing this rare, sweet moment.
"Your shirt is inside out," I giggled, pulling back.
Jungkook just looked up at me and gave a small chuckle, (like the gif at the beginning) reassuring me that we were gonna be okay, us and our little issues. We'd be okay, no matter where we were or what we did. Damn, I love love.
