the book of rants

can't we all have our own freedom?

summary
a little rant about the ability to think for yourself. 

♔

why is it that people always expect you to do things that are not you? on friday night, i was being pressured into spending every sunday, and i mean every and all sundays, doing something that doesn't interest me? why do people always assume that you are someone you are not?

even though i am not the most open or extravagant person, i expect that my friends understand and respect what i want to do. why is it seemingly unheard of that i can say no. i can say no to not going out at night, or going to the cinema, or spending sundays with a bunch of people doing things i do not want to do. why is it that only those who push or are constantly in your face get their voices heard. are we not all equals? do we not all deserve the same basic rights?

can't we all just accept that we are different, and while you may not understand these difference between us, accept them. let everyone else do what they want to do. seriously, are we becoming so backwards, that only those 'above' you have a say, that you have to do what they say even when it is your responsibility and your right to be able to say, think and do as you wish.

are we willing to become so backwards that we no longer accept that others do and act differently to you. are we willing to slander and tear someone down just because they are different? can't we see that those who say no, might say it for a good reason? is it so hard to accept rejection that you have to tear someone down for no good reason because you are scared that they might say no?

do we all want to create trauma and drama because it excites us?
do we, as human beings, have to create an endless amount of hate and unwant because it makes us feel special?
and i think that the truth is yes. we all want our own tragedy because life is boring without it. we all want the screaming, the pain and the survival that comes with it.

but i want to say no

i want to say no, not only to the hate and the pain that comes with being alive but to doing things, to spending time with others, and i know that you have to say yes, that you have a responsibility to do things for others and to be there for your friends, but somethimes i need to say no

i need to be alone

being alone doesn't mean i dont love you and that i don't care, but it means that i need and i want ot have some space, to read a book or watch a movie, to be alone, to not spend every and all sundays doing something for you and not me

to be selfish

to think about myself first

and i'm sorry but occasionally it has to happen