Darkness

Free fall

I jumped into the sea of ignorance without thinking it twice.
I jumped from a high building in a free fall.

I hoped I would finish in the darkness, but instead I realized my mind and my body wanted to live beyond the light of the sun.

Body and mind fought against the falling, but the sadness of my heart was too heavy and gravity was not helping with it.

Free falling. I felt the cold wind in my face. I closed my eyes and took air into my nose strongly, expecting the sour smell of dead to freeze my heart, but instead, a sweet smell woke me up.

I realized I was not sad at all, I felt something new on my face, a small smile poking out my lips.

I had a strange feeling inside me pushing to leave, it was stronger than the memory of pain, loneliness, failure, anguish and sadness, that seemed to dissolve gradually, becoming something so ethereal that it was hard to believe that they had  ever been real.

But what should I do now? It is to late to fix it, there is nothing I can do to change my destiny, because I had chosen a path of no return, I should get on falling, free falling, till I reach the end of it and I die.

Pulvis et umbra sum

*Note: To understand some of the metaphoric images in this poem, you should know that in Platonic philosophy, the sun is symbol of knowledge and knowledge is the only way to reach happiness, because happiness is a product of the right, and the right is only found in the truth, so to know what the truth is, you need to possess the recuaired knowledge.

This poem starts talking about reaching ignorance and by the end of the stanza the goal is darkness, analyzing this we can easily understand that the light must refer to knowledge. And following this line of thoughts you should be able to understand the message in the poem.