Let her go

Seven

- AUTHORS NOTE: I didn't check for spelling/ grammar mistakes yet, but I'll do it soon so please excuse the mistakes you find, sorry! Have fun with this chapter!-

Seven: Sundays

I wake up around 5am, like every Sunday morning.

It's an inner clock, it just works like that.

I stand up, shower and walk through the cabin in just a towel.

Then I watch TV for a long amount of time, like every Sunday morning, trying to relax a bit.

While watching TV, I read the book I bought a few days ago.

Actually, I shouldn't have bought it, because it's a waste of money to buy it a few days before my death.

But my aunt knows me too well, and she would have gotten worried if my last book shopping had been over two weeks ago.

It's already 7:30am when I close the book, half-through it already, and turn off the TV.

What could I do next?

If my mother would be here now, she would have told me to eat something.

Breakfast is important.

I can almost hear her telling me the words she said every morning, and I grabbed an apple and explained that I just never was hungry at that time.

But she isn't here right now.

She's in a mental hospital, tried to kill herself more than once, not even caring about me then.

I take out my favorite sweat pants and walk back into the small bathroom.

Mustering myself in the mirror, my eyes narrow.

Ew.

Why can't I look at bit better?

Why can't I look like my father?

He was handsome, and he always had been.

He had dark blue eyes, and brown hair that he used to cut short.

He was muscular, tall, just everything was perfect on him.

I chuckle slightly.

Nobody would ever think he was my father.

The only thing I have in common with him - and it isn't even that good looking on me - are the dark blue eyes.

But I'm blonde, and blonde with blue eyes isn't anything special.

Maybe I'm tall, a bitty bit muscular and sporty, but nothing compared to my dad or the other boys in our school.

My mom was pretty beautiful, and my dad was handsome, and they made an ugly child.

How?!

Oh yes, my mother is beautiful when she isn't drunk or high, I think.

She looked gorgeous the day she went out with Ricky.

Well, Ricky.

He dumped my mother not that long time ago.

I'm not going to miss him, really, that freaking drug addict.

How could my mom like him?

Whatever, what does my mom interest me?

She wanted to leave me again.

And she even lied to me yesterday, one more time, and I think she knows I noticed.

Ricky will visit me later.