Touched by the Fear

[24]

Stiles stopped a few feet from her and blinked in surprise, as if just noticing her. "Hey," he said.

"Hey," Hollis said quietly. The silence had been broken but she could still feel the awkwardness that seemed to cover them like a thick blanket. She searched for something else to say, to erase the uncomfortable feeling but nothing came to mind.

"Are you ok?" Stiles asked, beating her to speak. "I mean, I tried to call you a few times. I wanted to, you know, see if you were ok but you didn't answer. Or call back."

The ignored calls and unread messages flashed through her mind and a feeling of guilt filled her. "Yeah, I know," she said, nodding. "I just... I didn't want to talk. I needed some time to think and to try to figure things out." He nodded understandingly but Hollis could see that he was still hurt. Their previous conversation had been anything but pleasant and it weighed heavily on them. "Sorry for ignoring you," she added, as if that would make everything better.

"No, it's ok," he said with a reassuring smile that faded fast. "So, did you? Figure things out?"

"Not even close," Hollis answered, shaking her head. Things were too complicated for her to figure out in such a short amount of time. She barely knew where to start with trying to make sense of what she had learned. Each time she thought she had it all sorted out, she learned something new and was taken back to square one. It was frustrating, to say the least. Her head pounded from all the information her mind stored and the over-thinking that had taken place in just a few short hours. "I think I'll need more than half a day for that."

"Yeah. It's-it's a lot to figure out," Stiles agreed. He looked past her, at the field that was almost empty save for a few stragglers. "So, you came to the game," he said, surprise coating his words as he turned his attention back to her. "I didn't think you would after...you know. Everything."

"Yeah, well I came to support you. It was your first game," Hollis said with a small smile. "Scott said you'd only be a few minutes late but you missed the whole game."

"I know." He sighed, avoiding eye contact with her. He paused and briefly looked past her. "Scott's still here, right? I need to talk to him about...that."

"He's still here...I think. Allison went to talk to him a few minutes ago," Hollis said, glancing in the direction of the school. "So, where were you?" She tore her eyes away from the building, focusing her attention on Stiles.

"I had to do something, and I thought I'd be back in time but things got complicated," he explained. "Really, really complicated."

Hollis let out the breath she had been holding in hopes of getting a clear answer. "Why is it that the truth is always complicated with you?" She asked, sadness seeping into her words.

He looked towards her, catching her tone quickly. "It's not. It's just...I can't."

"But why? What harm would it do for you to just tell me the truth?" Hollis took a step closer and looked up at him, trying to understand why he wouldn't tell her. "I already know some things so...," she trailed off, shrugging.

"I just don't want you involved in this," he told her gently.

Sighing, Hollis shook her head. "Ok, fine. Don't tell me," she said and took a step back. "Go find Scott or whatever you were going to do. I'm going home," she said, feeling resigned and exhausted. "Congrats, by the way. Your team won. Not that you'd know." Turning, she started to walk away from him. She half-hoped that he would stop her, give her a little more information other than 'it' and 'something' that would uncomplicate everything but he didn't. Looking over her shoulder, she saw him walk in the opposite direction towards the school. A dull ache filled her as she watched him go but, when he looked over his shoulder at her, it subsided just a little bit.