petrichor

status update: relationship

i have learned i don't need a man

because i see people posting about their relationship statuses

single

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single

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single

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i dont need a man to determine my worth

and i dont need a relationship to occupy my time

instead of buying gifts, i plan out world domination

i decide my own future

i decide my own destiny

i dont need a person and a connection to point me in the right direction

because at last i realise that i am enough for myself

that i dont need men chasing after me

what i need is to chase after myself

i dont need to be pursued by another person to feel like i deserve the world

because my own love for myself should be enough

i should know that i deserve the universe and all that it contains

but your relationship status posts update in my head

and as all snapchat users know, not all updates are good.

i think that man = happiness,

that man = worth,

that i cannot exist without some counterpart to remind me that my existence is, in part, only to satisfy.

but my worth is not determined by anyone else except for myself.

i was "updated" to think that i cannot be my own woman.

that i have to belong to someone.

you may not believe in god,

but he put all of us on this earth for a reason,

and i firmly believe that he never wanted us to find worth in anyone if we cannot find it in ourselves.

some may think i am self centered for such a bold statement.

i have grow up being taught to stop hating myself because that's not okay.

yet whenever a person shows an ounce of self love, they are bombarded with hate,

telling them to stop being so selfish and conceited.

i need to love myself.

so cut the update

and remember that loving yourself comes first.