FEBRUARY 1ST, PART 1
#10
Its been almost two months. Two whole months, seeing you in the arms of another person. Its too much for me, Lou and I can't take it anymore. I can't live with the fact that I can't have you anymore.
Im not enough for you and I know it. I want it to be me but I'm not enough for you. I can't give you what you want and need because I'm not enough for you. I was never enough and will never be enough.
But I'm so thankful of what he had, Lou. So so thankful. Five years of happiness with you.
To be honest, I can't really remember how my life went before you came in. It's like my life wasn't complete until I met you. You made me the happiest no matter the mood, the place, the time; you had the power to make me smile in an instant. It's crazy.
You made things possible, easier when I thought that it was already going to fall down.
And I honestly don't know how you suddenly had a huge impact in my life when we got paired for that one English project. Yes, I still do remember how and why we met. Your paper flew away, I caught it and seriously, I still do think that you were stalking me. I mean, who writes a person's name who they still haven't properly met with hearts all around it?
It was the awkwardest yet most adorable thing.
You were openly bisexual and I was still a closeted homosexual. I answered you mamy months later, you helped me come out to everyone and you were there with me while people threw homophobic slurs.
Just, you were there for me more than anyone else ever had in my entire life.
Maybe that's why I couldn't let you go just so easily. You were there when I had no one else. When I needed someone the most. And now that I need someone again, you aren't here anymore.
The little things you gave to me, they still mean so much to me. One of my most favorite are the rainbow bears you won for me. The little one and the big one. Everytime you had the chance to visit, you sometimes would dress them up as the weirdest yet pleasing things ever.
You told me they represented us. Our relationship.
Its like one single move I make, I remember you. I'm that truly, madly, crazy, deeply in love with you.
But it seems to you now, it's a whole lot different.
You were there for her, you gave her gifts, you gave her smiles, you gave her a fucking huge ass bear for her birthday. Everything that you did to me, you did it to her too. And I watched you, being happy with her.
You smiled twice as you did with her compared to our last few months.
It makes my heart ache so bad, it makes my heart crush into even tinier pieces, but you're finally happy and that's all I want. For you to be always happy.
YOU ARE READING
So Much For My Happy Ending || l.s.
Fanfiction"All this time you were pretending, so much for my happy ending." ㅡㅡㅡ Openly gay couple Harry and Louis were inseparable and were not afraid to be loud about their relationship. Yet who knew that one phone call can end it all for them. New relations...
