"you know, it's so weird to think about how i was a year ago." she looks over at her best friend.
"i mean, sure, i look the same and i feel like nothing physically has changed, but i've grown so much."
"one year ago, i decided to quit my passion and even though it broke my heart at the time, i definitely needed a break and i've never been happier since the day i decided i wasn't going back. this whole year has been a break on that and it helped me realize that i don't want to pursue that anymore. it's toxic and i feel like i have oxygen to have me. the fact that i can even say that while smiling proves that i'm happy."
she throws herself onto her bed as she looks up at the white ceiling like stars are in front of her.
"i lost my friend group around this time. sure, it was so heartbreaking seeing them all hanging out and it still feels weird every time we talk because there's not really anything to talk about anymore, we have no conversations. it's almost like we're strangers in the hallway. but, truth is, i feel so much better knowing that they're not here with me right now. this year has given me the opportunity to make new friends and become closer to the ones i had, and i'm so grateful for them. i don't know how long it'll be until they're gone from my life, but for now, they're what i have and what i think i want."
"i could've sworn i was in love with someone a year ago." she snorts as her friend laughs but reminisces on the two am conversations they had together.
"i remember being so heartbroken that he was graduating. like, we barely had any connection and there i was being sad because i thought i was in love. but, truth is, that wasn't love. it was me just being in love with a fantasy. an idea of love that i couldn't get. and now, i'm starting to understand love more than ever now. sure, i may not be in love right now but i'm fine knowing that there's someone better than me."
she turns over and looks at her best friend sitting in the chair smiling.
"and then there's us. we've been best friends for four years now and you've stuck with me through it all. i can't thank you enough for being in my life and being the only person i trust to tell everything with. it's not only been me that's grown, but you too. i'm so grateful for you being in my adventure and i want you in our journey no matter what happens."
her friend smiles through the phone.
"i can't wait for us to meet."
YOU ARE READING
words i will never say in person
Poetry"i'm forever grateful for the fact that we met, and the fact that the stars made their way to align for us makes me feel comfortable knowing that the universe can't split us up."
