Losing Herself

22

In the days that followed everything had changed drastically. Connie had taken a dramatic turn for the worst after having to start a fresh course of treatment. Jacob sat on the sofa as he ran his hands softly through her hair trying to comfort her. For the past 48 hours she'd barely managed to keep anything down and sleep had been fleeting. He looked down at her knowing that this wasn't good for either of them. She hadn't had anything to drink for days and she was beyond weak.

Charlie and Duffy lingered in the doorway looking across the room to where she lay. They'd been there through out the week after Jacob had taken some time away from the hospital without much explanation. "I'm worried about how dehydrated she is, she's not drinking any fluids. Combine that with the treatment and it isn't good." Charlie nodded as he rubbed a hand across his forehead. They all knew she needed admitting, but the reluctance from Connie continued to stop them from acting.

Blake stepped through the pair carrying a glass of water towards the living room passing it to Connie. She smiled gently as she sat forwards to have a drink. Blake had insisted on staying to do what he could to help, he'd never seen her this bad and it worried him as much as it did everyone else. Resting back down against Jacob once more, Blake shared a look with his father who seemed unable to say much at the moment.

Duffy wandered into the room while Charlie remained to one side. "Connie, love I just need to check you over. Think you can manage?" Connie swallowed as best she could, her throat dry from the lack of liquids over the past few days. Connie flinched, the pain in her arm still there from the last treatment session she'd had. Duffy finished and almost as soon as she had Connie was reaching forwards to the bin that rested beside the sofa. Jacob pulled her hair backwards gently keeping it from her face until she felt able to settle again.

"Con, we need to get you to hospital-" "No..." He felt the pain in her voice, she knew as well as him she needed proper treatment yet it seemed she was terrified of going in. She moved once again, throwing up before clutching her stomach. Jacob shook his head carefully moving from behind her. "That's it, I'm calling an ambulance Connie because I can't sit here watching you in this much pain." She didn't try and argue this time, the tears rolling down her cheeks as fear set in. "I'll call them, stay with her." Charlie stepped out of the room making the call while Jacob knelt beside the sofa.

"Blake can you go upstairs and put some of her things into a bag?" He nodded disappearing from the room while Duffy shared a glance with Jacob before leaving the pair alone. "Baby? Talk to me, I know there's more to this then you're letting on." He ran his hand gently over her forehead and into her hair. "I'm scared-" "I know you are, but we're all here and you need this-" "I don't want to go to hospital, please don't make me go Jacob." He gritted his teeth taking hold of her hand within his. "You need treating Connie, this isn't right and we both know it." "What if I never come out of there."

He sighed moving down placing a kiss in her hair. "I would never let that happen. You're going to be okay sweet cheeks, I promise you." She squeezed his hand as best she could feeling him beside her as she let her eyes close feeling exhausted.

Despite all the worry and angst, they'd managed to get her to hospital relatively quickly. Jacob, Blake and Charlie remained outside the room, Jacob unable to stand still as he paced back and forth across the corridor. Duffy returned upstairs after briefly letting everyone downstairs know what was happening. His head snapped up as the doctor stepped out of her side room, Jacob glancing through the window to see her asleep. "What's going on? Is she going to be okay?" "She's extremely dehydrated and hasn't responded well to the treatment. We're worried about her not finishing this course as it can have adverse effects once started and interrupted-" "But it's making her feel like this? You can't seriously expect her to keep going?"

Charlie placed a hand to Jacob's shoulder as he dragged his hand over his face looking away. "Is she okay?" "We've given her some pain relief and hooked her up to an IV line. She's going to have to stay in for a couple of days." "Whatever it'll take to get her better." The doctor nodded as he passed Jacob leaving him just as worried as when they'd got here. "He knows what he's talking about Jacob, he wouldn't suggest anything that would put her at risk." He clenched his jaw staring through the window at her. He couldn't help but be thrown back to when he'd first found out about the cancer.

"Can I go sit with her Dad?" He offered a quick smile as he squeezed his son's shoulder, Blake slipping into her room after he'd nodded. Jacob watched as Blake cautiously sat beside the bed placing a hand over hers almost warily. Jacob pushed a hand against the wall as he dropped his head. "She promised me she wouldn't let her find out this way... She told me she wouldn't let Grace find out the way I did." "Jacob-" He shrugged the comforting hand from his shoulder before walking away down the corridor. "Give him sometime..." Charlie looked to Duffy before nodding as they remained beside one another watching through the window as Connie slept.

Jacob soon found himself standing in their spot outside the hospital. He stared over into the gardens as he leaned back against the wall of the hospital. Pulling his phone from his pocket he stared down at her name. He'd promised her he would never make this decision for her, but what choice did he have when she was laying upstairs the way she was.

It felt like he was waiting forever, the sound of the phone seemingly drowning out everything else around him until a voice spiked at the other end. "Hello?" "Is this Sam?" "Yes who's this?" Jacob looked up taking a deep breath as he made the final decision on what to do. "It doesn't matter who I am right now, I need to talk to you. It's about Connie..." She needed her daughter by her side, and if this was the only way it could happen then it's what he had to do.