Falling Slowly

Pt.2|Ch.11

•••••Austyn's Perspective

The funeral came and went.
The eulogy was spoken, sweet words that none of us would remember.

And after that, I went numb.

I existed without living, saw without understanding, and heard without listening.

The first seven days after it happened went exactly as could be expected.

I stayed home, sitting in the middle of my new surroundings, rereading every book I owned.

Sky would check up on me every now and then, but I didn't feel like having a conversation.

He's ask a couple questions regarding my eating and sleeping schedule, and then he'd leave me alone.

I hadn't seen Ben in days, but I didn't know how many. I wasn't sure if I wanted to see him, or if I just needed a break.
As much as I loved him, this was a wreckage that he couldn't fix.

Aiden called once, but I didn't answer, and she hadn't called again since.

Josh would text me 'good morning' every day, but I didn't respond.

At least I had stopped crying; I had no tears left.
At least I was able to sleep; I had no reason to wake.
At least I was still drinking water; everything tasted the same.
At least I was still reading; I was left with nothing but time.

On the last day of the first week, Sky came home from the store and set his keys on the kitchen counter, before turning to me and taking a deep breath.

"I think I'm gonna go back to Newsies on Monday." He said.

I looked up from my fifth time reading Wuthering Heights. "To perform?"

He shrugged. "Maybe, maybe not. Jeff'll probably have Nick review everything with me, just in case, but I at least want to be there for the show. Will you be okay here by yourself?"

"Yeah," I nodded, looking back down at my book.

He walked into the living room, taking the seat next to me. "Did you eat dinner yet?"

I frowned, trying to remember. "I don't think I ate anything today."

"Do you want me to fix you something?"

"I'm not hungry." I shrugged. "I'll eat later."

"Okay, but just—hey," he stopped, placing his hand under my chin and lifting my head to meet my eyes. "Remember to eat something later, when you get hungry, okay?"

I nodded. "Okay."

He gave me a stern look. "Promise me."

That's when I told the second lie.

"I promise."

•••Benjamin's Perspective

I hadn't seen Austyn in exactly seven days.
Everyone said that she was just working through it, and needed space.
I agreed with them, but I worried more and more as each day went by.

-Ben:
«How are you doing?»

-Sky:
«Better.»
«I'm coming back to work Monday.»

-Ben:
«That's good. We'll be glad to have you back.»
«How is she?»

-Sky:
«I don't know. She's not talking much, and she hasn't gone anywhere.»

-Ben:
«Maybe she's still processing it?»

-Sky:
«Maybe. I hope so, at least. I check up on her every so often though, and if anything changes, I'll let you know.»

-Ben:
«Thanks. Take care of yourself, man. I'll see you Monday.»

-Sky:
«See you.»

I shut my phone off and set it down on the counter, taking a deep breath.

Josh looked up. "What's bothering you?"

"Take a wild guess." I said, coming off more sarcastically than I'd intended.

"Don't snap at me." He stood up, carrying his empty cereal bowl to the sink. "If you don't want to talk, then don't talk."

"Sorry," I sighed, rubbing my eyes. "I probably should talk,"

"Then talk." Josh pulled out a chair and sat down, crossing his arms.

I took another breath, attempting to gather my thoughts. "I really don't know what to say,"

"You're worried about her."

"Yeah," I nodded. "But isn't everyone?"

"Well," he shrugged, "yes, but it's different for you."

"I just wish it hadn't happened at all." I said, despising how helpless I was. "Aiden hasn't seen Sky since the funeral, and hasn't even spoken to him since Aunt Stacey died in the first place."

"And you haven't seen Austyn since then either—"

"You haven't seen either one of them since then!" I retorted bitterly. "Sky's coming back to the show on Monday, but Austyn hasn't even left the house."

Josh took my biting tone with a calm visage. "These things happen. There's no way to stop life from moving on."

"Can't it just stop for a little bit?" I pleaded. "The sun still comes up, the sky still turns blue, the flowers still have color. Don't they know what happened to us?"

He shook his head. "The world won't stop turning, Ben. Why try to make it hold still?"

"I'm not, I'm not. I just want to know that Austyn isn't."

Josh threw his hands up in exasperation. "Then call her."

I shook my head. "She doesn't want to talk to anyone right now."

He raised an eyebrow. "Does it hurt to try?"

"I guess not." I shrugged. "I'll do it sometime soon."

"Okay." He stood up from his seat. "Just don't wait too long."

I should've listened to him and called her right then, rather than wait until Monday like I did.
I should've realized how little time was left.