The Play

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Mr. Reyes:
Places for scene two! People, remember: Once Puck gives you the pansy serum, you have to really sell that you're transforming into a zombie. Excellent work, Ms. Valentine

Jeremy:
Excellent? But Chloe's terrible, she never remembers her..
Mr. Reyes? You can't let anyone drink from that beaker!

Mr. Reyes:
Don't be silly! It's more than safe! I should know, I tried it myself

Squip:
Up, up, down, down, left, right, A

Jeremy:
I have to get out there!

Mr. Reyes:
I can't let you do that, Jeremy

Jeremy:
Mr. Reyes?

Mr. Reyes:
You needy, pathetic, self-centered students!
You think I wanted to teach high school drama? In NEW JERSEY?
My SQUIP says I can go all the way to Broadway!
I just have to keep you from ruining my big night!

Jeremy:
You're going to SQUIP the whole cast!

Squip:
That's just for starters!

Jeremy:
That's not what I wanted!

Squip:
It's the only way to achieve what you want!

Jeremy:
I'll fight back! Alcohol messes you up, right? I'll get drunk!

Squip:
And I'll be back when you're sober! Unless you plan on staying wasted forever?

Jeremy:
You're a computer, there has to be a way to turn you off

Squip:
I'd stop there. You don't want to end up like Rich

Jeremy:
Rich..? What did he..?

Rich:
I need Mountain Dew Red!

Jeremy:
That's it! Green Mountain Dew activates you, Red shuts you off!

Squip:
Why do you think we had it discontinued? To get rid of me now, you'd need a time machine to the 1990's!

Jeremy:
Or a friend who's so old-school he buys 90's soft drinks in the back room at Spencer's gifts!

Squip:
Too bad you don't have one of those... anymore

Jeremy:
Michael! Call Michael!

Squip:
I'm going to improve your life, Jeremy, if I have to take over the entire student body to do it!

Michael:
Michael makes an entrance!

Jeremy:
Michael!

Michael:
I was just in the audience, thinking "This is pretty good for a school play!"
Then I was like... "This is way too good for a school play!!!" They've all been Squipped, right?

Jeremy:
W-W-Wait, you came to see me in the play?

Michael:
Even brought my own refreshments!

Ensemble:
Ah ah ah ah ah ah!

Jeremy:
Is that?!

Michael:
Mountain Dew Red! Told you I did my research! Oh, hey, Jake? This is gonna sound weird, but if I hold down Jeremy, can you make him drink this Mountain Dew Red?

Jake:
Actually, that doesn't sound weird at all

Squip:
Up, up, down, down, left, right, A

Jake:
Ow!

Squip:
Ha ha ha

Jake:
I was already pretty boss before
Now I'm totally boss and then some more!
I'm livin' the upgrade!

Chloe & Brooke:
There you are, Jeremy

La la la...

Brooke:
I just want you to know I'm not mad that you broke my heart and then slept with my best friend

Chloe:
And I'm not mad you dated my best friend and didn't sleep with me

Brooke:
He didn't sleep with you?

Chloe:
No

Brooke:
He didn't sleep with me!

Chloe:
No!

Both:
Ohmygod, why was I so jealous of you? *gasp* You were jealous of me? That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me! Sisters forever! Jinx!

Michael:
Ugh...

Jeremy:
Michael, the bottle! There's still a few drops left!

Michael:
How am I supposed to get past them?

Jeremy:
Apocalypse of the Damned! Level Nine!

Both:
The Cafetorium!

Michael:
Got it!

Both:
Find the bad guy, push 'em aside
Then move on forward with your friend at your side!
It's a two player game, so when they make an attack
You know you got a brother gonna have your back!
Then you stay on track and.. Ah!.. remain on course
And if they give you a smack you.. Gah!.. you use your force
And if you leave your brother behind that's lame
'Cause it's an effed up world but it's a two player game!
Hey!

Jenna Roland:
I know what you're doing, Michael
I know what everyone's doing! All the time!

The Cast of the Play:
I just feel soooo connected to you guys right now!

Squip:
Ah! You don't want to drink that, Jeremy!

Jeremy:
Why not?

Squip:
Because then you'll never be with her!

Christine:
You are the person I want to be with every day
And this is something that I've been afraid to say

Jeremy:
That is not Christine

Squip:
I assure you, it is! Only her fears and her insecurities have been removed!

Christine & Ensemble:
You're the guy I am so kinda into (into)
The guy I am totally into (into)
This feeling is new
Jeremy
I love you

Squip:
That's your cue!

Jeremy:
She'll do whatever I want!

Squip:
That's what I promised!

Jeremy:
Great. Drink this

Squip:
Wait..

Christine:
Ah!

All:
Ah!

Squip:
Jeremy!
J-Je-Jeremy?
Jere-re
Ah
Woah
Ah
Woah
Ah
Woah
Woah!
Jeremy!
Jere..
Ah!

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