Sans AU oneshots

Classic. Cause he has soo much of it.

***this all happened in a dream I literally just woke up from***in place of my mom I'm using toriel***

I'm so happy mother let my friends over for the sleepover. Papy, undyne, alphys, frisk, and.....well..........the guy of your dreams. *cue in dreamy voice* Sans~.
Knock
Knock

As soon as you heard it you knew it was sans. It's not important that you remembered his KNOCK! "Who's there!" I called back. "Theodore" I heard back. "Theodore who???"
"Theodore was closed so I knocked." I opened the door, "Hiya sansy. Come on in. Where the others?"
"Hm? Oh they ditched it." He said while taking his slippers off at the door. My face completely dropped and I sure hope he didn't notice, immediately putting on a smile.
But of course he seen through it. "Yea. I thought they were being complete jerks, so I came so ya Wouldn't be sitting here waiting for people who's not gonna be there."
I gave him a little thank you smile and instantly got bored.
"What are we gooonna doooo?"
"I don't know. Anything ya want really."
I gave him a questioning glance. "You're talking more then normal. Ya ok bud?"
Yea. Never better." He said with an eye roll and sigh. He then stretched and yawned. "I'm gonna get som sleep. You?"
Ye. Just one thing." I smiled at him. My thoughts goin craaaaazy.
Nononononoonononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononojonojonojojojojojonononobbonononobobobonoboboboboboninonobononononononononononononononono
Yep. My mind. Sans looked at me still. I walked over to him, held his cheek, leaned down and placed my lips to his teeth.

Uh oh.

I broke him.

He was wobbly suddenly and had this stupid cute look on his face. Oh gosh I've seen this before. He's drunk.
I. Made. Him. Drunk. From. A. Kiss.

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRRIIIIICK!!!!!!!!

"Awwwww~ you're sooo cuuutte when you smiiiiiilllle~" sans mumbled out. Somehow. And I died.
I put his arm over me and helped him walk towards the bunk bed. "Do you want top or bottom?" He gave me a surprised and 'are you stupid' look. "Bunk, Sans, top or bottom bunk."
"Boootttoooommm~" ok.
I helped him get comfy there near the back of it was. I curled up in the front thinking about trying to fix sans. I had the sensation of movement then felt warm skele-hands around me.
"My precious little (nickname)." Waaaaiiiit! He didn't sound drunk anymore. But before you could question him you heard snoring.
I turned over in his arms and curled up with him around me.

+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+
/present time\
*talking to three mini (sans x you ship name)*
AND THATS HOW WE FELL IN LOVE!!
Kid 1: so Mommy made Daddy drunk and Daddy did stupid things.
Kid 2: so a kiss can make you drunk?
Kid 3: I understand it.
*DEATH GLARE OF SIBLING RIVALRY*