As one. Always. (A Loki fan fiction)

Chapter 32

I woke up to the sound of silence and an empty bed. That’s romantic…I sighed and rolled over, wishing Loki was here. Last night had been…indescribable. I was right. Loki was definitely good in bed. More than good. Amazing. Just thinking about it made me ache to see him, kiss him, touch him.

‘Where are you Loki?’ I reached over to the side table to grab my necklace and put it on. I still wore it every day since Loki first gave it to me.

‘In a war council meeting, deciding what to do about Jotunheim.’ He sounded bored, but he felt happy that I had been thinking of him. ‘I am truly sorry I couldn’t stay with you this morning. But showing up late on my second day isn’t ideal.’

I sighed. ‘I’m sure someone would have come to wake you up.’

‘I wouldn’t want that either. A king is supposed to be chaste until marriage. I just could wait no longer.’

I nodded, though he couldn’t see me. ‘I’ll be around the palace if you need something.’ Then I was alone again. I didn’t know what I’d get up to today around here. Everything was so out of it, with Thor gone and the potential war approaching. Everyone was stressed and worried. And now Loki was king.

I didn’t know what to think or feel. On the one hand, I was happy for him. Happy that he was happy that he was where he wanted to be. I was proud of him. But I wasn’t sure what that meant for us. Would it change our relationship?

Loki had just told me he was supposed to be chaste until marriage. So even though he had been married before, he still had to wait until he was married again, or risk scandal. We would also never have the same alone time like we used to. Loki couldn’t simply sneak off to be with me anymore. We had to be more formal to each other, make more public appearances. And I wasn’t sure if I liked that. Loki was already acting differently around me. I touched the necklace at my neck, remembering the feelings of that perfect day. Those feelings were still there, but I felt distant from Loki. Like he pushed me away. Would we ever be back to that happy, honeymoon place?

And then I had to think about the future. What if Thor didn’t come back? Or took a long time to come back? Loki would be king longer. Frigga already had doubts about Odin waking up. What if Loki was crowned king over Thor permanently? I didn’t know if he would be able to marry me. Sure, I was a noble. But I don’t know how people would react to having a Halfling as a queen, and their heirs being a quarter human.

Would Loki even be able to have kids as king? He was full Frost Giant, with a spell over him. Would that spell pass on to his kids? It must have when he had Nari. Would it happen again? Before, it all seemed just minor details, things I didn’t think about. I didn’t need to think about them, because Loki wasn’t going to be in the public eye much as a prince. But as king, these things were huge. I didn’t know if I would be able to cope with all this.

Then again, it wasn’t like I was getting married to Loki. He didn’t ask.

*******************************

I was in the library, practicing illusions. There was no one out in the yard who wanted to spar for fun, only to train for war. So, I was using one of the text books I had found to teach myself on making illusions around me. I was picturing having a guard pacing in front of me. Simple enough, I had seen guards pacing a million times. I concentrated harder, picturing the smaller details of the image in my mind; the golden walls, a door way behind the guard, perhaps. Golden horned helmet. Armour details.

I opened my eyes to see the illusion in front of me. It covered a great deal of the room, but it wasn’t as life-like as I was hoping. It seemed…transparent. See through, unconvincing. I sighed, wondering how to make it look real. There was no point in casting illusions if they looked fake.