As one. Always. (A Loki fan fiction)

Chapter 21

I woke up groggy and my throat dry. Yup. I thought. I have a slight hangover. I heard shuffling and looked over to see Loki changing into his Asgardian clothing. “Get dressed.” He said, adjusting his vest, not looking at me. “We are leaving for home.” Then he left my room, leaving me no chance to argue. Not even looking in my general direction.

The beautiful memories of last night entered my mind: The kiss. Loki holding me close. How he smiled at me. Then the bitter memories: Loki pulling away. His curt goodnight. What was that about anyway? Getting out of bed, I went to find Loki looking for breakfast. Leaning against the door frame, I waited for him to acknowledge me. He didn’t, even when he couldn’t find the Frosted Flakes. My patience wore out. “So, are we going to talk about what happened last night?” He ignored me, continuing to search through the cupboards. “So we are just going to pretend nothing happened?” Loki paused momentarily, before continuing his search. Silence greeted me again. “I don’t want to leave just yet.”

“We are leaving today.” He found the cereal and pulled it out.

“I planned to be gone for four days. It’s only been three.”

“That was before I killed four people. Please do not argue, I am in no mood.” Loki argued with me. I huffed out of the kitchen. If we were going to be leaving, I was taking my time. I wanted a nice long shower before we left.

What was Loki’s problem? Why didn’t he even want to talk about last night? Was I a terrible kisser? That could be it, since I haven’t had tons of practice. But you would think he would have kept kissing me, or maybe even taught me. But he didn’t even want to look at me today, let alone kiss me or teach me how to kiss. Then it hit me right in the shower, mid thought. He was avoiding me, he wouldn’t look at me. He didn’t want to talk about last night. Loki regretted kissing me. And the realization was enough to make my mind race in panic.

I had never liked anyone the way I liked Loki. I always wanted to be around him, to talk to him, to confide in him. Even our little arguments meant something to me. I thought last night went great, and Loki didn’t seem to mind kissing me. So why did he regret it? Did he make a drunken mistake?

Either way, Loki regretted kissing me. And it hurt. I felt crushed, defeated. Why did I even think he liked me? He obviously doesn’t. You’re just his friend, I told myself, trying to tell myself it would be okay, it was no big deal.

I wondered if all girls lied to themselves after cruel rejection.

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In Asgard, a few hours later…

Sweat dripped down my forehead as I blocked my partner’s blow and dealt my own. I increased the force and pressure of the attack, speeding up to finish my opponent off. I was in no way feeling up to light sparring, and in no mood to dance around and give the new guy a chance.

I blocked his sword with one of my little swords, and with the other I swung in an arc, stopping just at his neck. He froze, his eyes on my face in surprise. “Good fight.” I said, taking my swords back and taking a step back. “Your defense needs practice.”

“I am not used to fighting two swords at once.” He said a little meekly to his own defense.

I sheathe my swords. “You may want to change that. Not every opponent will fight fair.” I turn to walk away, when the newbie stops me.

“What is your name, my lady?”

“Noelle.” I was trying to walk away. I wasn’t in the mood for chit chat. I just wanted to find another person to spar with so I didn’t have to think about earth or Loki, who still hasn’t said anything to me. I was still hurt, and I tried to find out what was wrong with me. Why did Loki regret kissing me? I spent a good hour in my room trying to figure it out, tears streaming, until I became angry that Loki was avoiding me, not giving me a straight answer. I think as his friend, I deserved one, and besides, he’s the one who made the mistake. So I went down to spar, see if Sif could offer me a way to forget my anger. Sure enough, the yard was full.