7-Eleven

Chapter 4 : The Collision

A new chapter !! This was hard to write cause I was having writer block while writing it but I saw my book reads getting higher, and that action alone had given me the energy to write more:-;

Warning ⚠️, you might need a tissue.

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It was the time of the year. Where Ivan decided, to meet his beloved parents that he very much disappointed all his life. It has been a long time since he met the person who gave birth to him. Ivan missed them with all his heart, even though he knew that they didn't. It doesn't matter if they act so coldly and hateful towards Ivan, they're still his parents and he still loves them.

Ivan knew, that he doesn't even deserve to be called as their child. He was a disappointment, a burden and liability to them. They raised him with so much love and compassion, just to find out that their child is a freak of nature. A freak, and not normal like others. Who wants to have a gay son? He can't give them grandchildren to play with. In conclusion, he was nothing but a worthless crap.

The more he thought about it, the more his heart ached. It felt as if someone stabbed it, breaking it into shattering pieces and left it there on the floor. The worst thing is, he let it be. Because deep down, he knew that he deserves it. Deserve every pain, every torture and suffering.

He decided to have some breakfast before going to his parents' house. He was going to fix himself an omelette and a cup of tea. While he was cutting the veggies for his omelette, his mind drifted off as he stared outside the window.

The weather outside was cloudy, rain could come pouring down anytime. The wind was whipping through the street, the trees were dancing around with leaves flying. The cold breeze can be felt inside Ivan's house, nipping through his epidermis. It was fairly dark outside, not like pitch black but if you didn't look at the clock, you wouldn't know that it was still morning.

"Ouch !"

He cursed out loud as he accidentally cut his finger with the sharp kitchen knife. Blood was oozing out of the cut, he quickly turned on the sink and washed the cut even though it stung like hell. Ivan cursed at himself for being so careless and clumsy. Ivan can't help but think of it as a bit of bad luck. Maybe it just his bad luck day, he shrugged at himself.

Or was it?

He put a plaster on the cut after cleaning it with rubbing alcohol. He continues fixing his breakfast and decided to make some for his parents too. He hoped that his parents will at least try the foods he made. The last time he brought his parents the food he made, they threw them away saying that they didn't want to get infected by his disgusting disease. It hurts but he was used to it. He was so excited on that day cause he was trying on a new recipe. He wanted to give honour to his parents to try it. But they threw it away.

His eyes were glossy as he tried to keep the tears from falling into the foods. He doesn't really mind the tears cause he can easily wipe them away. He used to cry anyway. He just wishes that he can wipe the pain in his heart away too. He sobbed silently as the pain in his heart became unbearable. He can practically hear all the harsh words that his parents threw at him.

The excruciating pain that stays like scars on his heart.

The unbearable pain that made him scream, sobbing for help.

The throbbing pain that brings nightmares upon nightmares to him every night.

Even if the damage can no longer be fixed.

He just wanted the pain to go away.

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The rain was pouring hard as Ivan drive through the day. There was no car in sight, Ivan was relieved for that. He thought, no one in their right mind would drive in this weather. But Ivan had no choice, he was halfway to his parents' house when the rain decided to come pouring down.

His sight was blocked as the rain kept on pouring down. The roads were also slippery so he makes sure to drive carefully. He was on the highway so he doesn't want to stop cause he was scared. He was surrounded by trees. What if something came out? He turned on the radio to calm his raging heart. His thoughts were slowly turning bad and that was the last thing he needed now.

Burning by Sam Smith suddenly played as he sang along to the lyrics.

I've been burning

Yes I've been burning

Such a burden, this flame on my chest

No insurance to pay for the damage

Yeah I've been burning, up since you left

He couldn't help but feel as if he can relate to the song. Ivan was not like he is now. He was a cheerful and bubbly kid. He loved making new friends and he got tons of it too. Sad was never a word in his dictionary. He loved to smile, and everyone around him loves having him around.

Sure, he still as cheerful and bubbly around people. But when he was alone, his mind will be surrounded with so many negative thoughts. His inner demon will come out and ravish what was left of him. His emotions were unstable. He knew he needed to meet a doctor but he was too scared. All these things happened to him, after the damned incident. That he even to this day, still regret and can't forget.

He was too caught up in his thoughts, he looked up to see that he was driving into a tree. Eyes wide, heart thumping as his anxiety hit the sky. He can feel the adrenaline in him getting rushed to his brain. He tried to turn the steering but the road was too slippery he couldn't make it. He even tried to stop the car by pressing the peddle but nothing worked. The road was too slippery it makes the car went faster.

THUMP

The car smashed the tree with a loud sound. It felt as if the time was turned into slow motion, as sharp pieces of glasses flying around. Cutting Ivan's skin where it met. The impulsive force from the crash was so hard that Ivan didn't even feel anything as his head smacked into the steering. He can feel the taste like iron from the blood that was dripping from his mouth.

At the time. He can't feel anything due to the adrenaline kicking in. His consciousness was slowly drifting away. Some part of his mind was happy because he was slowly drifting away from his never-ending misery. He knew everyone else would be happier without him anyways.

He thought he was going to die and he doesn't even know why, but the only thing in his mind right on that moment was Noah. He made him happy every time he met him. He smiled at the thought of Noah even though he knew he was slowly passing out. He cherished the moment that the two had even though it was little, it kept his heart calm and content.  He muttered the man name as he let out his last breath.

"N-Noah"

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