A Genuine Infatuation and A Theorem for Love

Chapter 5

 My eyelids felt strangely heavy and after several attempts I managed to see out of the darkness. I blinked a few rounds to get hold of my surroundings. The sunlight was only beginning to rise and shiny arrays of beams projected through the lace curtains of my window. I yawned and only then realization swept through me that I'd passed out on the floor. My spine hurt and so did every other sinew and joint of my already feeble body.

"Ow!" My legs felt stiff and I mentally promised myself to never have a repitition of last night. Last night... Dinner... The conversation... Marriage... The latter was enough a cause, to send me hurtling to the bathroom and to prepare myself for the day - away from my family's further intereference in my life.

 Thereafter I scurried to grab a set of newly washed uniform from the dryer and tip-toed to the recreation room. I held my breath upon passing Paul's and Bill's room and then made a light run towards my left and had the door closed behind my back in the light of a heartbeat. My heart was thumping unevenly, I knew I was overdoing this, but each time that word replayed laps in my head, I chose to act even harsher with more speed. My sole aim was to hurry away from home so that I could think calmly. Whilst ironing my white shirt I heard the shuffling of feet behind me. My pulse seemed to halt and I was rooted to the spot.

"Ignore, just ignore" I told myself. Upon finishing my ironing in a record of less than five minutes, I bolted out of door ignoring whoever had been there with me and hurried to the haven of my room, to get dressed. My bag was thrown over my bed and a few books were sprawled over the floor. I couldn't remember the last time, or any of it, where I had behaved this recklessly. But this wasn't the moment to ponder over such light matters. I wore my socks and snickers and tip-toed once again to the living hall.

 Luck was on my side today, perhaps, for I managed to scurry out of the house and race to the hill-top. I wasn't late, the bus was just about to leave and so I climbed on and hurriedly found a spare seat at the back. My favourite spot. Somehow I had drifted off to sleep again and sudden apply of brakes brought me to consciousness. Perhaps these were the symptoms of becoming insane... How could such a small word empower over my life and cause havoc?

 I got off the bus and slowly made my way towards the school-gates. Miranda, my best friend, hurried to meet me at the entrance. She had silky blonde hair and always carried a smile on her face wherever she appeared. She was my only companion, my happiness bubbled within only when I was with her. For she cared for me, unlike the rest, unlike my family. The thought of the plot the had in mind for my future kept shredding and stabbing at my severed heart.

"Hey Linda, ready for today's test?" Miranda jumped up and down shaking me out of my reverie.

"Test? OMIGOSH! Today's History test! How could I have forgotten?!" But I needn't an answer to that, I had been lost in moping over yesterday's event that I forgot something this significant. "Miranda, I'll meet you at class," I told her and ran off to my locker. I could hear her calling after me, yet, I could also feel the threatning of another wave of tears. This was all too much to handle, I didn't know whether I had enough strength in me to focus on the upcoming test. I was doomed. I would not graduate. Yet, I supposed my family wouldn't care either way. I had to focus. I had a year left to graduate from High School, surely they wouldn't bring on a wedding now, right?

I raced to my locker, punched in the lock code and threw the door open. While I was fetching my necessities, I felt the same precense as was in the recreation room this morning behind me. That put a damper to even the minute hopes I had for my future.

"What do you want, Paul? Just Leave-Me-Alone, alright?" I was frustrated very much at him. He dared show up expecting me to forget all that occured yesterday and be the friend that I was to him. Paul lacked social skills more than I did, so he could mostly be spotted at school with me and Maria during our free periods. I hated the fact that even now, I did care for him, I wanted nothing more than to give him a bear-hug telling him that he had a reason for why he behaved as such and that everything would fall into place, although I was the one in dire need of embracing consolation here. Yet, this wasn't any of those times, in fact my life was literally hanging onto the edge here, so I refused to play nice and I hated myself for it very much.

"Linda, please?" He begged. I could tell he was on the verge of tears. Miranda and I failed on countless attempts to bring him over to the manly side, and to be in command of his emotions. This again, added to the long list of failure, "just listen to me, okay? Mom..."

I cut him off mid-sentence, "I'm late for class, bye." With that, I ran off without so much as a glance to the broken hearted boy behind me. If this was the case of hopelessness as of his, was there a word that could define my situation?

P.S. : The picture to your right is Miranda :)