Maybe

Dallon couldn't pinpoint the exact moment his feelings developed towards the other man.

Maybe it was love at first sight. It was a late night in Texas when Dallon first encountered the then brown haired man. Loud, strong drumming was all that could be heard outside of the wild tour bus parties. Something pulled Dallon to the small practice room, lead him to open up the door. Inside was a lean younger man with messy auburn hair wearing nothing but Jeffree Star branded short shorts. Dallon felt a tightening in his throat, an increase in his heart rate and his hands starting to sweat a tiny bit as he watched the unaware stranger play. He had so much talent and was so stunning, all Dallon could mange to get out was a "Great job, dude!". The stranger looked up, and smiled.

Dallon would later learn the mans name: Ryan. Him and this Ryan would spend the rest of the night hiding away from the parties, talking under the stars. Dallon had never become this close with anyone in this short of an amount of time. The older man felt like he could spill his darkest secrets to this new drummer, but he didn't know why. He felt so happy and so nervous, trying not to make a fool out of himself in front of the calm and relaxed man.

Maybe it was the first time they played together all those years ago. Simply wanting to create something worthwhile, something to leave their mark. They had both been frustrated and so, so tired with where they believed they were stuck. It was time for something new, something better. The fist time they played together felt like a breathe of fresh air, like a weight was taken off Dallon's shoulders. Dallons mind was swirling with new emotion and there was just so many new opportunities for a band that strong.

Ryan had changed since the first time Dallon met him. He had dyed his hair darker and grown it out, he had also started to wear full clothing, to the secret disappointment of Dallon. Something hadn't changed though, Dallon and Ryan's connection. After every concert they would talk to each other while one of them drove. It was the only way they could stay awake and as much as they hated driving, they always offered to drive instead of the other members of The Brobecks. Dallon didn't know why they did this every night, but it felt right. Under the stars it felt like no one else existed, just the two men, the shitty van they drove and the road.

That was the first tour where Dallon felt like he was actually in a band. Playing larger venues, actually selling music and driving day and night to make it to the next town. This was also the first time Dallon started to see Ryan as...something else. He didn't understand it, this feeling Dallon had acquired. He didn't know why talking and being around Ryan felt different than with the other guys.

Maybe it was when Dallon called Ryan asking him to come over and try out this new, strange idea Dallon had. Both of the men had, once again, gotten stuck in the same rut. They were famous and successful in their bands known across the world. However, they didn't make the marks they dreamed about at night. Ryan resonated relief and gratitude towards Dallon for understanding that he needed this escape. Music needed to be an escape, not a duty.

Both men had grown and changed so much since 2009. Ryan cut his hair shorter and colored it black, and had some how improved on his already phenomenal skills. When they played together it felt like electricity was running through the air. There was a secret that only the two of them knew when they smiled. There was something in the way Ryan hugged Dallon and whispered 'thank you' as he left. It was something in the way Ryan's eyes crinkled when he smiled. It was something in the way Ryan's face shown under the stars. It was something Dallon had been packaging away in a neat little box since 2008. It was something that felt like coming home. It was something Dallon had to confront.

***

Ryan and Dallon were sitting on the couch, watching some boring movie neither of them were into, using the film as a cover up for Ryan to lay his head on Dallon's shoulder and Dallon to loosely wrap his arm around Ryan's shoulders.

Maybe it was something in the stars. At least that's what Ryan believed. Maybe something had been lain out long before either of them existed that would put them together. Ryan wasn't a religious man, but he did believe in one thing. Him and Dallon. They met, learned about one another and came to love each other under the stars. That had to mean something, have some power.

Ryan gazed upwards at the older man. He had grown so much, from an unsure and awkward young man to a confident, successful and talented adult. Dallon's mind seemed to be processing something, going through some internal debate. Ryan had an idea about what it was, hoped it was the same thing he had been worrying about for over a decade.

He leaned forward to Dallon ear and said those three words. Those three words Dallon had thought towards Ryan for a long time. Those three words Dallon had been struggling to get out for a lifetime.

"I
Love
You"

-fin