drugs, love & chairs?

First Chair

Chapter 2

First Chair

Waking up with a vodka bottle in my hand, I slowly get up from the table. I fall back onto my face. "Hangovers suck the fucking worst, so done with you head", I think to myself. I hear the annoying ring sound from the doorbell and answer the door, I glance through the window and notice my friend Kimberely is outside with a bag of marijuana, so I open the door and let her wonder inside. We roll a giant blunt and smoke till were both stoned. Breaking into the neighbors apartment next door, I steal a few bottles of tequila. Kimberely challenges me to see how much alcohol I can consume. A half an hour later I am completely intoxicated. We stumble on top of my couch and we start chatting about the most random topics. She brings up the video. Us being intoxicated, she dares me to imitate the girl from the video on my dining room chair. She pulls out her phone and starts to record, as I slowly undress while grinding on the chair. Before you know it I am completely naked on the chair, humping and moaning, I am basically the drunk version of Lady Gaga singing Alejandro as I push the chair leg in between my woman hood. Forgetting my surroundings, my mind and my body take my mind off everything else, feeling as if me and the chair are the only ones on the earth. That includes not remembering Laysha had this whole session on tape.

About fifteen minutes or so, I became exhausted and fell asleep on the chair. Kimberely being the little clever bitch she is, uploaded the video to a porn site to make some profit. She then sneaks out to leave me to wake up with a worse hangover. I had no clue on this whatsoever until a few hours after it was uploaded to the site. Waking up, I slowly walk, somewhat similar to a zombie to the kitchen and take some aspirin. Walking to the couch, I chill out for awhile, noticing my laptop was in a unusual spot. I retrieve my laptop to watch some netflix when I notice something in particular on the screen. It was a porn site, I didn't remember masturbating or even the least bit wanting too. I avert my eyes to the video, at first I just assume its a porn star who looks very similar to me. It takes my whole body with shock, I almost have a heart attack, when I find to see it was a video of me having intercourse with a chair, a fucking chair. I watched the whole video from beginning to end several times, panicking. Looking through it has only several hundred views. Those thirsty fucks I think to myself, masturbating to a girl fucking a chair. I just hope this doesn't become viral like the original video or things might just go collapsing down hill.