Where's My Love Story?

Blood & Tears

I laid there in bed, wondering what to do now. Wondering what time it was. I saw light but not much, looks like a sunrise. Maybe I should apologize to Scarlett. Maybe I should get something to eat. Man, those two actions are my main objectives. Either save a friendship, or get some breakfast.

What's theist thing you remember? I remember getting home. Ugh I can't remember anything else. I want some to eat. Looks like my hunger won this one. I sit up and feel my back just shoot into pain. Ow!!

So that's what happened. I forgot. My back throbbed in pain. Just pulsing with pain. I looked over at my dresser and saw a little orange bottle. My elixir! I slowly sat up, trying not to bend my back too much. I'm pretty much failing at that.

Now that I'm sitting on the edge of my bed, maybe I can just walk over to get it. Nope, my legs pretty much went "nice try but we're not gonna help you"

I almost collapsed, I grabbed my sheets to keep from falling. I slowly stood up, legs shaking, and made my way to my dresser step by step. I don't know if it's from the pain meds or what. I probably look like a toddler.

I finally make it to the dresser, after about 15 mins of getting up. I open the bottle and look inside. I see little white pills, with a small 200g on it. I dump out the bottle onto my dresser. They clatter but stay in a nice neat pile with a couple sliding away.

I stand there, just looking at them. I know I have to take one. Maybe I should take two. Or three. Or five.

No! Shut up! I don't have to do that. I only need one dammit. I look away from the pile of narcotics on my dresser. I need my other drugs.

I desperately look around my Army backpack. I need that backpack. And no I'm going through withdrawal. I'm not an addict, let me find the bag then I'll explain. I move towards my bed but I feel my legs ready to give out from I under me. Uh oh.

I try lean forward so I atleast land on the bed but noooo. I fall straight down. It's not that my legs aren't working, just weak. I feel like freaking Bambi on ice over here. I use my arms to pull myself to my closet. Ha! Army crawl for my Army backpack. Sorry, I need laughter to get my mind off the pain of the stitches I just landed on.

I slowly made my way to the closet. Only 3 feet away but that's 3 feet of hell with stitches in your back and staples on your arm. I could feel myself bleeding along my side. One of them must have came loose. Ok, now I'm in pain. Almost there, I reach for the door knob. Come on!

I lift myself up and try to atleast rest on my knees. But that wasn't happening. I could move without being shot with pain. But I need my medicine. I have to take it. Otherwise he'll come out again. I don't want to move. Not again.

That motivation to stay here and to never give up. I pulled myself up with the door knob onto my knees. I didn't care about the pain at this point. I just wanted to get through this door. I turn the knob and realized something. The door opens outward. Hello floor.

I fell backwards and landed on my stitches. I cried out in pain. Not that anyone will help me but that hurt. I looked up and saw the door open. Atleast something went right with that. I crawled my way to closet and saw my backpack sitting there. Right in the middle of the closet, right where I left it.

I unzipped the pack and pulled out another orange bottle. With the pills rattling inside I made my way back to the bed. I'm probably leaving a blood trail behind me like a freaking snail. I climbed to get on top of the bed. I literally climbed my bed. It's only 3 feet off the ground but it felt like fucking Mt Fiji!

Finally laying back down in bed with some slight bleeding from my back, I opened the bottle and took 2 prescribed, 100mg of antidepressants. I didn't think you should know. I honestly didn't want to tell you. It's not that I'm sad all the time but it's just when I think about what happened with my Dad.

I laid back down and rested my head on the pillow. Feeling a tear roll down my cheek into my pillow. I wiped the next tear and looked at my hand. I was surprised to see blood mixed with it. I must've held my stitches while laying there. But that's all I seem to know now. Pain and sadness.

"Aw dammit!"

I sat up and looked at the dresser. I saw my pain meds sitting there.

"I haven't had breakfast yet."