Goth Problems # WattPride

Five

It became normal for us to hang out with those sophomore boys every Karaoke Night. As weeks wore on, Aaron began warming up to Myer. Troy was so sweet it was impossible not to love him, so he eventually did start chatting with the little guy too. Dyce, I guess, was just too much for Aaron. Myer shared that opinion on the F. Scott Fitzgerald obsessed loud-mouth.

About four months into our sophomore year, I was out with Troy and Dyce (who were now juniors) cramming for a test. Aaron had been asleep when I left the apartment. I placed a note near his head on the pillow and blew him a kiss before departing. Dyce got a text a few minutes into our study session and made a small noise. I glanced to him, but he said nothing. Troy questioned him, but got no response so I decided to shrug it off.

The next week, at Karaoke Night, a new addition was added begrudgingly to our little party. He was a freshman with bleached blonde hair that never smiled. When I saw him, I immediately thought about Aaron. Since starting college, my baby had been distant from his old friends. I was sure there were some new people in his life because he still went out without me sometimes. Still, I was worried and this guy seemed like someone Aaron could get along with.

I ran up to him while he was in line ordering from Dyce and struck up a conversation with him. Jacob, that was his name. The way he rolled his eyes when I asked if he wanted to sit with me and my friends only enforced my belief he was the perfect buddy for my love.

The kicker was my offering to buy him a muffin. That's literally the only reason he sat with us and, by the end of the night, he was agreeing to hang out again next weekend.

I got really close to Jacob. He reminded me so much of Aaron; beneath that gloomy, nihilistic exterior of his was a complete dweeb with a love of cartoons, sappy poetry, and pinwheels. No matter how hard I tried getting my baby to give him a chance, Aaron was dead-set against liking him. "Jacob is always giving you the eyes," he'd grumbled when I tried convincing him to come with me and Jacob to a movie that day. "I don't like it."

"'The eyes?'" I guffawed. He had to be kidding me.

"Look, I don't want to be fucking friends with some asshole who's into you! It makes me uncomfortable, Xavier! All of them make me uncomfortable! I really can't stand your new friends!" Aaron growled, swatting my hands away when I reached out to grab him. It was hard for me not to get angry here. He never tried to like them. He did the same thing my mom did to him; formed opinions before he even got to know them. Immediately upon meeting them, Aaron made the decision he wasn't gonna give them a chance. "I'm sorry. I'm really fucking sorry, okay? But I can't be around him."

"If you loved me, you'd be able to put up with that," was all I could force out. I wasn't the type to get really angry and boisterous during our fights. That's always been more of Aaron's area of expertise. I just stood there and took it and tried to help him. "And you seemed to be getting along better with Troy and Myer. Did something happen?"

Aaron's face went white. "No," he choked out. My eyes got wide. What was he hiding from me? We never kept secrets; it was one of the biggest reasons why we worked.

"Aaron," I cooed, wiping away my anger. The fear inside me took over and I grabbed my love's hands. "Tell me."

"You'll hate me," he responded, and I nearly felt my whole world collapse.

I shook my head. "How many times do I have to tell you that nothing can make me hate you?" I sighed, giving him a hopeful smile. What the hell did you do, Aaron?

But my boyfriend wasn't giving in. He pulled away and stormed into the bathroom. I was too frustrated to stick around, so I decided to go out and see the guys. Dyce had told me him, Troy, and Jacob were going to see a movie that night while Myer was sulking in his apartment. From what I could tell, Myer spent most of his time sulking in his apartment. What a life.