Something in you lit up heaven in me
The feeling won't let me sleep
'Cause I'm lost in the way you move, the way you feel.
▪▪▪
I always hated sneaking around.
It was hard to do, especially when I was who I was. There were constantly people following me around and I had grown used to it. Over the years I just had to learn to outsmart them. If that meant hiring someone who looked like me to go around as me for the day then so be it. I would do anything at this point.
When I woke up in Finn's hotel room, I was confused for a couple seconds. Said boy was asleep next to me, his curls sprawled out over the pillow and his mouth slightly open as he breathed quietly. It was hard not looking at him sometimes. Something about him drew me to him and it made my head spin.
He woke up not too long later. I hadn't even realized he was up until he spoke, scaring the absolute shit out of me and resulting in my phone falling on my face. He laughed at first but then he was super caring and even brought me a little bag of ice that he went down the hall to get.
We spent a lot of the day together that day. His publicist and manager were the nicest people I had ever met. They came in to talk to Finn for a while. To say they were surprised to see me was an understatement. The whole time they were teasing Finn under their breaths and giving him looks. I don't think they realized I saw them everytime. Everything seemed perfect that day.
That night I had to go see Jacob though. I felt an intense feeling of guilt even going. I felt guilty for lying about where I was to the both of them. I liked Finn. I had come to terms with that. It was an unexplainable feeling really. He made me happy and I felt at ease around him.
But I loved Jacob.
That was questionable though. I didn't even believe in love so what did I feel for him? Some strong feeling. If I really loved Jacob would I even be feeling these feelings for Finn? My head hurt just thinking about it. As I made my way to the little apartment he rented out just for us to see each other in I couldn't help the overwhelming nerves that were coming over me.
I stuck the key in the door and walked in, my eyes landing on Jacob immediately.
"Hey," I said with a tiny smile on my face.
He didn't answer. I set my bag down and walked towards him. He looked up as I stood in front of him.
"Where were you yesterday night?"
I sucked in a breath. He knew. He had to. I wasn't going to give in so easily though because maybe he didn't.
"I told you I-"
"Don't fucking lie to me!" He yelled and stood up.
I stepped back out of instinct and started to shake my head. He pulled his phone out of his pocket and tapped the screen a few times before practically shoving it into my hands and almost making me drop my own.
My eyes widened as I saw myself on the screen. It was the video from yesterday that Finn had recorded. I almost smiled at it as I heard Finn's loud laugh come from behind the camera but then I remembered who was showing me it. It ended and started to replay again but Jacob snatched the phone out of my hand quickly.
"Why did you lie?" He said staring me down.
"B-because-"
"Bullshit! I don't want your excuses!" He cut me off.
