Symphony Of A Serial Killer

Chapter 3. Blink of an Eye

Though quickly sidestepping, the bottle still managed to hit my shoulder with a heavy thud. Lovely, first I’m staring at a reflection that isn’t my own; then I’m getting sagely advice from the neighborhood whore, now there’s a distinct pain that’s pulsating in my shoulder. My morning routine has taken drastic turns today, but I refuse to favor my shoulder and give him any satisfaction.

“Even after a six pack of beer this arm is still money! NCAA Division 1  all-star quarterback standin right here!” James proudly boasts.

He’s been here before, I’m certain of it. It took him no effort to throw that at a so-called loved one and clearly there is no remorse. If there is, it’s being concealed behind his best Tiger Woods fist pump impression. Is this why mom left him? Was her body used for target practice, was she the reason his aim became so accurate? Yes, he credits it to his football glory days, but every washed up person relives their highlight reel to make themselves feel relevant.

Sad to admit, even I do. My life as a whole is a failure and I uncontrollably think back to when my family was whole, that’s my highlight reel. The simple life; being a kid and going out to buy a toy, spending all day at the arcade or bowling alley; even simply sitting on the couch between them watching cartoons.

Those were the times where everything made sense. It’s depressing to think how so much has changed. Someone who was so detrimental to the most blissful moments I’ve ever known is now the bane of my existence and we’re constantly at each other’s throats.

I’m only able to recall these memories with closed eyes, when they're open I see only hatred. Just like now with my heart pounding in my chest and the adrenaline pumping faster and faster throughout my body, those memories get sealed away deep inside to a location that even I don’t know.

You’d think I’m staring at him, instead I’m looking through him. Trying to fight allowing the numbness of my soul to take over. I cannot allow myself to exist in this world without empathy or remorse; I become someone else… someone that I think I like being more than who I am on the surface.

Still holding the watch, my hands are wrapped so tightly that my knuckles crack on their own. I can feel the broken pieces from the watch digging into my skin, blood slides between my fingers trying to escape my palms but I don’t care.

Laura can see it too. Her eyes lock as her jaw drops, leaving her speechless. I don’t know how, but I think I briefly peered into her soul. She wasn’t always this way, and even now she wishes she could erase everything she’s done in life and start again. This does not however, change the fact of who she chooses to continue to be in the present.

It was only for a few seconds… so hastily, seeing into her being was the distraction needed in order for me to let go. I failed, I caved… gave into the numbness, the desire to be invincible and not care; no empathy or remorse. Only cause and effect, action and reaction, he needs to be educated.

While calmly moving forward, words left my mouth yet the only sound I could hear was the throbbing from my shoulder. Though I couldn’t hear the words, I know they existed. I could tell by the look on his face. He went from the stupid happy Tiger Woods pose, to one of warning. His proud and smug smile wiped clean from his face, everyone present knew that the time for talk was over.

Laura didn’t matter, she was the no-count, it was only him and me. No longer in control of my own body, I dashed. With me drawing near, he’s so proud that he doesn’t move, standing his ground if you will. That will be his first and last mistake for there is no hesitation in my actions, my mind is made up.

He begins openning his mouth to speak, I’m sure it was going to be something cocky and crude. It … just… didn’t matter, nothing mattered anymore. Before an ounce of air could escape, a snap rang out gently echoing in the morning air. My motion fluid and precise, his neck now broken, just like that it was over.

The years of neglect and torment, the abuse, it all went away. At this moment in time he was forgiven, and it all happened before he could blink. Closing my eyes, I relished in the moment. This feeling of peace, this moment here is my solace.

It amuses me, no matter how big and bad you are, or even how much you contribute to this world, you can be made irrelevant in an instant. Simply gone, everything you’ve worked to achieve no longer benefitting you.

I release a gentle sigh in response to the high-pitched scream that’s now assaulting my ears, it belongs to Laura. She’s still on the ground giving witness to it all. I’m not concerned with her, I never intended on hiding anything from anyone. Having seen his limp body crumble to the porch; he now lies awkwardly bent at the knees with his back to the floor.

Standing tall and triumphant, I look down upon his lifeless frame with eyes as cold as the Alaskan air. It’s amazing how much power one can wield by simply detaching themselves from all of these bullshit worldly expectations. I slowly squat down while looking over my shoulder towards Laura, oh the genuine horror on her face. It pleases me and I let her know this by flashing a satisfied grin.

I turn back to the collapsed rag doll that is James. Very calm and casually, I lean forward meeting him face to face. Interesting, I’ve always wondered this but never cared enough to look it up, why do people die with their eyes open?