My Cold Days

Ch. 9

    I woke up on my wood-framed bed under my sheets. A sharp pain hit my head as soon as I tried to sit up. My hand immediately went to my head as my other arm supported all my weight when I sat up. I wasn't sure what had happened. The last thing I remembered was freezing to death in the bathroom stall. How did I end up here?

     "There is something seriously wrong with you, Anne, " Jack started talking so suddenly. He was sitting on his bed on the opposite side of the room. They must have brought it in while I was out. Jack's voice was so angry. His expression was painted with rage, more so than in the restroom. This made me a little nervous. I decided to play dumb.

     "What do you mean?" I asked trying to sound as innocent as possible. He seemed astonished by my question. I must have made it worst.

     "Wh- What do I mean? What the hell, Anne? You almost died in there! You didn't do anything to try and get out. You could have died..." His voice kept getting louder and angrier until he arrived at his last sentence. He just sounded sad and his voice trailed off. Desperate to keep his angry approach towards me, he kept talking.

     "Why didn't you try to get out of there on your own? Why did you just lay there?" Jack was standing now in the middle of the room. I think he was trying to make me feel guilty. Or maybe... He was just hurt.

     "Were you the one who got me out?" I asked meekly.

     "Yes. I saw that you still hadn't got out of your stall. It had been too long. I got there and you looked so lifeless. I didn't understand..." His voice had gotten weaker again. He seemed too pained to finish his sentence. He stepped back and sat down on his bed. He didn't have the strength to be so angry at me anymore. I took this as an opportunity to get mad at him.

     "I don't care what you understand and don't understand. Couldn't you just leave me there? If I wanted to be like that, why didn't you just leave it?" I changed my demeanor entirely. I was now angry and practically yelling at him. He let out a laugh in disbelief.

     "So you did it on purpose? See, I was thinking maybe you were too weak to get out but no. You actually stayed there so you could die. What the hell is wrong with you?" He regained his angry tone. This time, I didn't think he would give up his anger. The only thing I could do was try to fight him with my own anger.

     "Maybe I didn't care! Maybe I was okay with dying! Maybe I wanted to die!" I was so irate when I said that. Jack seemed hurt for a moment by what I said then returned to his heated state. Why should he be hurt? It's my life. He's barely known me. We've been together for two days. He shouldn't have the right to care so much and to be so furious with me.

     "Anne, you shouldn't die. At least, not like that, " His tone changed entirely. He wasn't engulfed in rage at me anymore. He was empathetic. I wasn't so quick to calm down. I still wanted to be bitter and infuriated. I was determined to show him that he had no place prying into my life and telling me what to do.

     "I'm a monster, Jack! And I know you can't understand that, so just leave me alone!" My eyes were swelling with tears again. How many times am I going to cry today? The room suddenly felt really warm. I didn't notice until now, but I was wearing Jack's hoodie. I didn't even realize he was in a white undershirt. He must have given me the hoodie to warm me up. Despite the sweet gesture, I was still angry.

     I angrily took off the hoodie and threw it at him across the room. He still wasn't returning the irritation. He seemed hurt by the fact that I gave him the hoodie. He was still trying to calm me down. The room kept getting hotter.

     "You're not a monster, Anne. You're the farthest thing from it. I know it's only been a couple of days that we've known each other, but I know you don't want to hurt anyone, " He stood up and walked towards me. I backed away in my bed as he got closer. He stopped in front of my bed frame and bent down. Even though Jack took on a calmer approach, I still wanted to throw fire at him and prove him wrong.