Hearts & Rockets

Change

We pulled up to Amerigo, an Italian restaurant near my old hospital. "I haven't been down here in a while." I got Sutton out of her car seat and she held both Hunter and mine's hands as we slowly, but surely made our way into the front doors.

"Hey, Sam," Hunter called, waving his free hand, "Hi, I'm Hunter." He extended his hand toward the pretty, athletic blonde woman beside Sam.

"Hi Hunter, I'm Amy," She shook his hand, then turned to me and said "You must be Jenna,' shaking my hand. 

"This is Sutton," Hunter said, "Say hi." Sutton waved as we were escorted to our seats by the hostess. 

"She's cute as button," Amy said, waving to Sutton from across the table.

"Yesterday she turned two," Sam chimed in, "sorry about the dirt Jenna, that was my bad."

I laughed it off, "She survived, it's part of being a kid." We placed our orders and I got Sutton a kids pasta dish, balancing feeding her and myself. Seeing Sam with someone else was super weird, but he looked happy. I'm sure Amy knew about Joelle, and I thought about going to bring some new flowers just as Sam interrupted my thought.

"Jenna, I just wanted to thank you for bringing the flowers, I forgot to mention it yesterday." There was a twinkle in is green eyes, I smiled and nodded.

"Any time," I took a sip of my sangria, "I was just thinking I should go refresh them sometime this week." We continued to discuss summer plans and learned that Amy and Sam met at a Booster Juice downtown and got talking. Amy was a nurse at Tennessee State U.

"Lots of mono, handing out condoms and hang overs." She rolled her eyes as she had a sip of her drink. "There's the actual occasional emergency, sports injuries and what not."

Amy asked how Hunter and I met and how I found living in Tennessee now compared to when I lived in Toronto. Before we knew it, the sun was setting and we needed to get our wiggly toddler home for a run before bed.

We said our goodbyes and parted ways. On the way home, Hunter said, "I liked her, she's down to earth."

"Yeah she's super nice." I looked over my shoulder to see Sutton babbling to herself, an instant smile came across my face. We made our way into the house and I texted Stephanie.

J: We're back. Wanna come up?

S: Did you talk to Hunter

J: Sort of not really

S: 5 mins

I put my phone down on the counter and got a toy out for Sutton to play with. You sat so well during dinner," I kissed her head, "good job." I turned some music on and sat in the living room while Hunter tackled some work emails. I sang along to whatever was crooning through the speakers while Sutton danced and babbled along, singing some actual words. 

"She's so flipping cute." Stephanie said, grabbing a seat on the sofa, "I'm still in awe of how you do it. You were on flipping tour with appendicitis."

"Don't remind me, that was awful." I turned back to watch Sutton wiggle and shake to the songs. "You go girl," I laughed, "Shake it off, shake it off."

"I'm feeling better after we talked yesterday. Thank you for giving me some space and a comfy bed."

"You're absolutely welcome. I also got you pasta from dinner," I nodded toward the kitchen island, "figured you would've been to modest to cook in my kitchen."

"You're a good soul." I looked at the time and over at Sutton who was laying on the floor with a toy.

"What do you say we clean up? Time for bed."

"Noooo."

"Excuse me, Sutton it is time for bed, mommy, daddy and Stephanie are going to bed."

"Noooo." She rolled over so her back was facing me. I nodded to Steph to leave the room with me.

"Good night Sutton," I turned off the lights in the living room and stepped just past the archway so she couldn't see us. "She's got my stubbornness." Stephanie smirked. We waited for about three minutes until i heard the toy get plunked into the toy box.

"Maaaaaammmma"

"Yes Sutton," I turned the lights back on and stood in the archway, "what do you want."

"Up?"

I shook my head, "We have to finish cleaning up first."

She flopped to the ground, screaming. I walked away, refusing to give into the tantrum and heated up Stephanie's dinner for her. "Take this and run," I laughed, "I'm going to be here a while."

Hunter strolled into the kitchen, "Daaddaaa." He looked at me and I shook my head.

"Wait til she's calm, she's tired but we need to clean up." Sutton finally calmed down enough for Hunter to go talk to her first.

"Sutton, toys away first, then bed, okay?" She flopped quietly. When she realized her dad wasn't budging, she hauled herself up of the rug, grabbed a toy and dropped it in the basket. Hunter helped pick up a toy, I went and turned off the music and picked up my exhausted child.

"Thank you Sutton, say night night Stephanie. " Hunter and I tucked Sutton in and we made our way back to the kitchen.

"Do you know," Steph asked, scrolling through her phone, "can I change my flight online or can I do it at the airport."

"Umm," I shrugged, "I don't know, maybe call in the morning? Is there a rush?"

She shook her head, "I just can't figure stuff out here, I want to sort this mess out. I'm such a failure."

"You're not a failure," Hunter piped up, "he's not the right person for you. There's no excuse for him to treat you that way." I nodded.

"How can we help you?" I asked, placing my hand over hers.

"I'm gonna go talk to your parents and a lawyer when I get back." I gave her my parents phone numbers and we called it a night. We got into bed and my eyes were stinging with tears, Hunter wrapped his arms around me and I didn't fight it. Tears streamed down my cheeks as he comforted me.

 When you try not to look at me
Scared that I'll see you hurting
You're not hiding anything, no
And frankly it's got me worried
Nobody knows you better than I do
I keep my promises, I'm fighting for you

You're not alone
I'll listen till your tears give out
You're safe and sound, I swear that I won't let you down
What's hurting you I, I feel it too
I mean it when I say
When you cry, I cry with you, with you