In The Shadow Of Her Smile

Chapter 4 - The Sky in Her Eyes

The next few days passed by almost the same, and I started to leave later, just so I could walk behind her.

She always tells her friends she is waiting for someone, then waits until they're out of sight and, after a while, heads home.

Alone.

As I followed her more often, I started to notice her little habbits. How she always walked on that little stone wall, how she always murmured the same tune, how she always looked at the same things.

But the most confusing to me was the staring at the sky thing she always did, and the most confuzing part is that is was the only thing making her seem less sad when she was not around people.

But, suddenly, there was a change in routine. She went out of her way and entered a small park to which only a small amount of street lights got.

But then again, there was less people and noise, so I guess I understood.

There was no one in the park, as it really was late, but she still sat on one bench that was far from the others. And I couldn't tell why.

I got closer but stopped behind one bush, afraid she would see me.

I looked at her. She was gazing at the stars again. Or at the moon, I wasn't really sure. But I was sure as hell I didn't understand why she did it all the time.

"You can join me if you want." - I almost got a heart attack when she spoke. Well, I guess I wasn't as invisible as I thought I was.

I walked over to her and sat on the bench beside her.

"How did you know I was here?" - I wasn't looking at her as I spoke, I was looking up, trying to understand.

"I knew. I knew you were following me for the last couple of days, and I know that I'm not the only one staying too long after everyone is gone."

"I guess I'm not as subtle as I hoped to be" - a weak laugh - "No, you're really not."

We sat there in silence for a while, she lost in her own head, and I collecting courage to ask her what I wanted to.

"Why?"

"Why what?" - I could hear in her voice she understood the question, as much as I heard she didn't want to answer it, but I couldn't let it go this time. Not again.

Never again.

"Why do you lie to them and then walk home alone?"

"You really love picking your nose in other people's buisness, don't you?"

"Avoiding the question."

"So what if I am?"

Silence again.

"What if I am..." only a whisper this time.

We continued to look at the stars.

I lioked at her and said - "Why do you lie to them, aren't they your friends?"

She didn't answer, so I turned my head to the sky again.

"It's none of your buisness." - her voice was silent, careful...

But she was wrong.

It was my buisness. It will always be my buisness.

"But-"

She turned to me now, eyes like stone - "No buts, you don't have a reason to be so concerned about me, so don't push it."

I turned to her, looking her straight in the eyes - "Do I really need a reason to care about what is haplening to someone?"

"BUT WHY WOULD YOU CARE?!" - I just sat there, paralysed.

"Why would you..." - she whispered again, on the edge of tears.

When she turned her gaze from me this time, she didn't look up to the sky, but down to the dirty land.

"Just don't, ok. Just forget about it."

"But what if I don't want to." - I said as gentle as I could.

She looked me in the eyes, hers glittering with tears - "Just forget about it, about me. Please"

I broke the eye contact, not being able to hold her stare for long, and looked down. After a few minutes I raised and started to walk home.

The last thing I heard were her whispers, which she let out with tears.

She was only repeating one word.

Please