Whispered Kiss

Secrets

"Are you okay?"

My eyes met Dianna's reflection as she busied herself with my hair. The hair dryer in one hand and the brush in another. Both stopped working as her eyes met mine. We stared at another. Dianna knew me better than my own mother did and at times, I couldn't hide my emotions from her. She saw what I didn't even know I expressed. My gaze drifted away first.

"I'm just tired."

I used the lamest excuse I could find but it held part truth. Last night had been coincidence. Dianna usually wasn't so oblivious to my struggles and I knew I fooled myself into thinking she didn't suspect anything. Maybe she couldn't admit it to herself. Maybe she chose to look the other way. I didn't blame her. Admittance wasn't easy, especially after everything we've both gone through. Neither of us wanted a repeat. I imagine it was equally as hard for Dianna as it was for me.

"Are you sure? You're abnormally quiet. If you're not ready to work, you should tell me."

There it was, the friendship bond that interpreted me better than I did myself. I didn't answer her right away, and she didn't push me, instead she reached down for a bobby pin, and blow-dried another strip of hair. She found me this morning trudging up the stairs in skew clothes and a ponytail not suitable for the first day of work. She didn't say a word, instead pointed to my room where she dug out suitable office clothes and commanded me to sit while she did my hair.

What could I tell my dear friend? The truth was a packet of nasty-psychotic truths I didn't want to jump out of their box. If I could scarcely face the contents of said box, how would Dianna be able to face it? She loved me, and I loved her, but the things happenings to me and the process I went through to eliminate it, would only cause more concern and probably land me in a permanent position at the mental hospital. Nor could I escape my burdens by admitting the truth. Yes, I didn't feel ready for reality, but it didn't mean I needed to cower away in my room for the rest of my miserable life. Bills didn't pay themselves and my four-bedroom walls couldn't distract me the same way the real world could. The freak-out with the mirror last night was a clear indication, I needed to find normalcy between the crazy because my normalcy was becoming my crazy.

In the end, I chose a saver topic to talk about, a topic which did prickle my interest.

"I'll be okay, don't stress. I do however want to know more about who I'll be working for. The interview had been abrupt, and I didn't get a chance to ask questions, or gather more intel."

Affinity Black Inc wasn't a secret in our town. When Dianna mentioned she'd gotten an interview for me at the main division of Affinity Black, it came as a surprise. The company was renowned for not hiring within the original company, instead your chances of finding a job in one of the branch companies where far better. The branches were usually not situated within the Damesville. Back in the day, Affinity Black started as a minor business, which later grew into the teeming business we all knew today. It had been the first and the last big business in Damesville which preferred its size and unpolluted air. Affinity Black also held most of the local businesses afloat allowing for the town to stay the same. Other areas such as passing tourists and frequent festivals provided income for the rest of the town's infrastructure.

For this reason, I chose to move from my own rather dull town to a less dull, greener one. I had planned to start anew as Damesville was situated within an hour's driving distance both north and south, from big financially stable cities. It made it ideal for my lifestyle. A lifestyle where I enjoyed the occasional night out and fraternizing with the single men, while still being able to return home to a quiet neighbourhood and indulge in my quieter, hermit side when the urge crossed my path. For all the spark I had, I loved being able to retreat and miff on my couch. Dianna and I had shared a tiny condominium in our old town and our paths would've divided. She would have moved to one of the nearby cities, and I to Damesville. We had plans for girls-night outs, weekend get-togethers, and intermingling our single lifestyles with both town and city men.