I Don't Like The World, I Only Like You

Chapter5.2: My Dearest Hao Wu Yi

007

Since Guan Chao grew up together with me, he does not have an appreciation of gender differences. Once, Mr. F, Hao Wu Yi, Guan Chao and I were strolling home together. Mr. F and I were way ahead, Guan Chao hovered in the middle whilst Hao Wu Yi lingered behind. All of a sudden Hao Wu Yi stopped and hollered for me.

"Joey, did you bring that thing?"

"What?"

She mouthed something at me.

I was befuddled.

Guan Chao said, "Sanitary pad."

"What?" I didn't manage to catch what Guan Chao was saying.

"Hao Wu Yi is asking, whether you have any sanitary pads on you! Her period is here!" Guan Chao's voice rang out brightly.

Hao Wu Yi froze instantly. Even the ten-thousand-years-iceberg-face Mr. F blushed...

008

Hao Wu Yi had a childhood sweetheart. As he was four years older than her, he was studying in university when we were in high school. Their parents were very close, sometimes even directly referring to each other as in-laws. Because she was frequently spoilt by her boyfriend, Hao Wu Yi had always been a carefree and joyful girl. However, when we were in Year 1 of high school, her boyfriend suddenly requested to break up.

Hao Wu Yi was devastated, and lost a great amount of weight. After being extremely listless for half a month, she called me one night, saying that she was determined to have a proper talk with her ex-boyfriend the next day. Finally, she asked me secretively, "Do you know how to apply makeup?"

Of course I didn't know how to, and asked her why she wanted to apply makeup.

She replied, "Because I want to appear in front of him looking my best."

As a result, the next day Hao Wu Yi stole her mum's makeup pouch and came to my house. After spending an entire afternoon experimenting with the makeup set, we finally managed to apply some make up on Hao Wu Yi which we personally thought was extremely beautiful but was extremely ugly in actuality. I praised her as being China's Paris Hilton, whilst she complimented me as being Mainland's Kuei Lun-Mei. Guan Chao, who was sitting beside us, couldn't bear to hear more, and commented that the friendship between girls was highly pretentious.

I retorted that he didn't know anything about female friendships. Why would we need female best friends? It's only so that we are able to satisfy our own vanity! China's Paris thus proceeded to negotiate with her ex-boyfriend. Although I'm unclear about what happened, I knew that when the negotiations ended Hao Wu Yi was wailing like a baby, refusing to return home. Thus, her ex-boyfriend had to locate my number from her mobile phone. I dragged Guan Chao along to pick her up.

I still recall that night. It was a dark and windy night and we found Hao Wu Yi by the river. She was crying ferociously, and her hair was in a mess. The makeup on her face had begun to run, causing her face to look like an artist's palette. According to Guan Chao, he was so frightened that his legs felt like jelly - because he thought that it was a river spirit had emerged.

Subsequently, the ex-boyfriend had an extremely unreasonable request. He said that as long as Hao Wu Yi managed to complete folding 9,999 lucky stars before his birthday as a birthday gift, he would get back together with Hao Wu Yi.