A Good Day to Remember (unedited)

Chapter One - September 7th, 2018 - Sebastien

I'm finally admitting it. I'm an asshole. I'll stop denying it.

But I blame her.

There was a time when I thought that we could work, but she had a horrible addiction to self-harm. She tried to quit, but addictions aren't easy to quit.

I realize that now.

When I broke up with her, it was because of that addiction, but then I became addicted to shit. I became a different person. She's the one that pointed it out.

And she was right. Dreams of the Dead was never going to make it.

She gave me a CD right before I graduated. It was a demo for an album. Her album. That album was released last Tuesday, and it's honestly really good.

But when she gave me the demo, she gave me a note and a speech.

She came to my house at the end of May with a small package with a letter on the top. She even called my step-mom and asked if it was okay, and Trina said yes, so she came over, gave me a lecture about being a hypocrite, and left the package, which was the demo.

When we first started talking, I knew that she had an addiction, but I was hoping she could get over it. It's not that easy. I know that now.

I'm with my friends Michael and Megann and some others at the high school in the band room; they're about ready to step off to march down to the University football field for a high school football game. They're part of the marching band.

She's not in band anymore. She got booted out last year because she was depressed. She doesn't seem to be anymore, though.

I got to witness it: her getting kicked out. It was painful to see.

We were on a band trip, and she had just had a panic attack, and she decided to ask Liszt if it would be a good idea for her to quit, even though she would never actually quit, and he decided not to even give her a choice because she had issues with self-harm. And she wasn't embarrassed about it; that she had issues with that.

It kinda pissed me off, but it was good for her.

Liszt shouldn't have kicked her out, because she was getting better. I enjoyed watching her get better. But she screwed up once, hurt herself once, and he couldn't tolerate it anymore. She was upset, but she seems to have lightened up. She got out of that toxic environment and started getting better. It was good for her.

She proved me wrong in so many ways.

She's outside, waiting for somebody. I'm also pretty sure that she's not allowed in the band room as said by her dad. But why would she be waiting for somebody? From what I remember, she's no longer friends with anyone in band.

"Are you coming to the band meeting tonight?" Blake wonders, approaching me. I shrug; I don't plan on it. "We have something really important to talk to you about. We're trying to restart Dreams of the Dead."

As if that's going to make me want to go.

"I hope you show up." And he leaves, just like that.

I haven't thought about restarting Dreams of the Dead, not since she sent the demo, which opened my eyes, but also led me more into my addiction.

"Seb!" Megann launches herself onto me. "I wish you were here to play with us."

"So do I."

Not really. It's sort of freeing, no longer being in high school. I'm only saying "so do I" because I know that's what she wants to hear. I've been mostly saying shit like that recently, because she's been the only thing on my mind. I've been thinking about her since she released her album a couple of days ago.