Nothing is Forever

Chapter 15 - On the Right Track - Alissa Lauren Kiang:

"Wha- where am I?" I ask, confused, and tired.

"You're safe honey, that's all that matters," my mom tries to comfort me, but I'm still confused -that is until I look out the windows.

I look around the hospital room and see an I.V. pole hooked up to me. The room is painted a plain white almost enough to make me claustrophobic, but the view out the window is what really upsets me. It looks out onto a lush green forest, something that used to calm me, and something that I used to love. For a second, I don't realize why the view upsets me, but then I flashback to the cabin, and I remember what I had gone through.

"Shut the blinds!" I scream. "Shut them! Now!" I grip my head with my left hand, trying to forget. My dad rushes over to the hospital blinds, and the view disappears, now covered by blinds the same shade of white as the plain hospital walls. I turn away from the window and stare at the paintings on the other side of the room and fall asleep, hoping to escape.

I wake up to the sounds of my mom and dad talking about something in hushed whispers I pretend as if I'm still sleeping.

"I don't know if she's okay..." my mom starts, trailing off.

"She's been through so much, I don't know if she ever will be," my dad says, his voice full of concern, and something else... perhaps it was fear?

"Should we get her to a therapist? I don't think that it's unlikely for her to experience some sort of post-traumatic stress disorder, and we have no idea how bad her depression might get. I'm scared for what she might do, what she's already done is bad enough, but without her friends to help her through it all along with us, I'm not sure if she'll be okay," my mom suggests, ever being the psychiatrist.

"But she's always been so adamant that she didn't want to talk about her feelings to anyone. The only ones she ever opened up to were her four friends. And now with them gone, do you really think that she wants to talk to someone about something so personal with someone?"

I sit up, finally having to interject. "Mom... I know what I said, but... I want to talk to someone. Someone who doesn't know anything about it... I just need someone... please..." I plead to them.

"Yeah honey, anything you need," my mom promises me, "As soon as you're ready, we'll find someone, I promise." She comes up to the bed, and I rest my head on her stomach.

"I just want... to feel happy, and to feel... normal again," She holds me, as I start to ramble.

"I know baby, and we want you to feel normal too. You should be able to go home soon too." She kisses the top of my head and backs up. "We'll be back soon, honey I promise."

My dad comes up to me and hugs me. "You'll be okay kiddo, you'll be okay."

I lay down on the bed, the tears falling down my cheeks cover the already tear-stained pillow. Somehow, I fall asleep, finally escaping, even if only for a little bit.

I move to ring the doorbell but notice a sign on it that says 'please knock on the door, as the bell is broken. Thank you'. I shrug and raise my left hand to knock on the dark mahogany wood door. My knock is answered by a middle-aged woman with kind eyes, she smiles at me and motions for me to come in.

"Come in dear, I assume you're Alissa, my husband's newest patient." I expect her to shake my hand, but instead, she pulls me in for a hug. Surprised, I don't know how to react, but once the element of surprise has worn off, I hug her back. I grip her tightly with both of my hands, once again glad to finally be able to use my hands once more. It had been a horrible few months of wearing that thing, and I had just gotten it off the week before. I lean into the hug and sigh, a little bit of happiness finally returning to me. The hug is the hug of a mother, one I hadn't gotten since I'd come back from the cabin. I reminded my mother too much of my brother now, my mother could barely look at me without remembering him. No matter how my parents try to hide it, I can always see the pain in their eyes every time they see me.