The Vamps Fanfiction.

Been A Son - Nirvanna

I needed to sort myself out. How could I be so fucked up and thinking how I do when i'm surrounded by such amazing people? I've a supportive family, they always try their best, they support me no matter what I go threw and always pick me up when i'm down. I have an amazing boyfriend, amazing friends, get to travel with a band and see everyday just how amazing Tristan and the rest of the boys are, how no matter how much fame gets thrown their way they remain grounded, respectful and still thinking about how they could help me and their fans. And then i've got Emma, shes been here since day once. She's seen me at my worst, experienced my worst moments and my best, shes understanding and caring.

So why am I the way I am? Why do I get myself in states where I am extremely down, where I want to end my own life? Why am I so fucked up, why can't I just appreciate everything good in my life and accept it for what it is.

"Shannon, are you ready?"

"Oh, yeah sorry"

"Lets go then"

Tristan was standing before me with his arm out strecthed waiting for me to greet his hand. He was smiling down at me with those amazing clear eyes, I have a good life.

"So where do you wana eat?"

"Am, I'm really in the mood for pasta or something"

"So italian? Theres a nice place in the center of London"

"Great"

We left the elevator only to see a swarm of excited fans at the hotel door. This has become my life. As we approach them, holding hands the fans begin screaming for Tristan and even some for me. We stop, take pictures, Tristan signs somethings, we chat for abit then they let us leave peacefully. Some fans follow us down the road as we decide to walk but always keeping their distance, respecting us and our space.

"Thank You"

"I love this place, it does the best pizza and pasta's"

"Good, because i'm starving" I begin looking through the menu as we both sit in silence weighing up our options.

"Shannon" I notice Tris close his menu and place on the table before looking up to meet my eyes.

"Yeah?"

"How have you been?" I look back at the menu.

"I'm okay" I laugh slighlty still looking down.

"No, Shan look at me" I pause, then meet his awaiting eyes.

"What?" I laugh again.

"How have you been? seriously been?" I was confused but part of me knew what he was getting at.

"Tris, dont"

"Why? Were in a relationship and I want to know"

"And i'm saying i'm okay so why can't you just accept that?"

"Because it isnt enough, you seem to forget how well I actually know you"

"What do you mean?" I was now intrigued.

"Like the way you always have that look in your eyes like theres a million things going on in your head, how you get quiet, how you seem nervous and reserved when usually your loudest one out of us all, how you seem to get so lost in your music or in a daydream, how you sleep more and eat less"

"You look to far into little things Tris, i'm fine" I kept his gaze.

"The last time you told me you were fine I didnt hear from you for days and you were in hospital"

Wow. I felt frustrated, on the spot, cornered, there was no way out of this one, I couldnt just get up and leave him sitting here in the restaurant.