Castiel Imagines

Panic Attack

Requested by Awesomeguy168. Guys isn't Misha so cute?! Anyway, carry on. Enjoy! ;)

You never got over the fear of monsters and supernatural beings. Sure, you were a hunter, and you faced those kinds of things every day, but the fear of them never went away. You held it in, most of the time, knowing that if you told Sam and Dean, that they would laugh at you. You had never met another hunter that had the same fear as you. Some hunters did fear it, but it wasn't the same as you. You legitimately were terrified of any and every monster you came across.

You, Sam, and Dean were in the Impala, heading back to the bunker from a hunt. You had just hunted down and killed a Changeling, which was, by far, the creepiest monster to you. You were practically shaking in the backseat as the memories from the hunt swirled through your brain. It was horrifying and you just wanted it to stop, but it wouldn't. You took a deep breath and leaned back, attempting to calm down.

When you pulled up to the bunker, you didn't get out of the car. It was the only place that you felt safe in. It didn't have the ghosts of Men of Letters wandering around in it. You sat back and watched as Sam and Dean looked at you with their eyebrows raised. You laughed nervously, your voice shaky and quiet as an image of the Changeling's true face appeared in your mind. You closed your eyes tightly and tried to erase it from your mind, but it wasn't working.

Sam opened the door slowly and put his hand on your knee. You opened your eyes and looked at him with only one word describing your facial expression. Fear. His gaze softened as he looked into your E/C eyes that were full of terror.

"Y/N? Are you okay?" Sam asked as he kept his hand on your knee. He was worried about you. You were just like a sister to him.

At this point, Dean had come over to see what was happening. He was trying to talk to Sam but he wasn't responding because his attention was on you as you sat in the car, terrified.

"U-uh, n-no." You stammered as your body shook from horror. You couldn't hide it anymore. It was too much for you.

"Here. Let's get you inside." Sam helped you step out of the car and onto the pavement. He put his right hand on your left shoulder as he guided you into the entrance. He let go of you as soon as you stepped inside and you sighed, but it came out as a forced, shaky exhale. You slowly stepped down from the platform, and onto the stairs. You would be fine, as long as you were careful as you descended down the staircase. You took the last step and you were on the bottom platform.

You headed towards the library, but you barely made it three steps until you collapsed onto the ground. You felt like your throat was closing up as you struggled to breathe. You chest began to hurt and your first thought was, 'I'm gonna die.' You were having a panic attack. And an intense one, at that.

Images of the Changeling flashed through your mind as you rolled around on the ground in a seizure-like manner. Your body was convulsing as you thrashed around, feeling as if the Changeling was keeping you from allowing air into your lungs.

You hadn't noticed, partly because you were having a panic attack, but Sam and Dean were screaming your name and trying to hold you down to keep you from hurting yourself, seeing that you had no control over your body. You closed your eyelids tighter as the images began to become more and more realistic.

You heard one of them scream, but you couldn't tell who it was. It was hard to hear from all of the uproar in your head. "CAS!" One of them screamed as loud as they could, and you felt hope rise up in your chest. Maybe Cas could help.

You heard another voice that you recognized but you couldn't put your finger on it. They seemed to be yelling at Sam and Dean to move away from you. You felt two fingers put pressure on your forehead before everything went black.

-

You woke up and you were in your bed in the bunker. You didn't remember anything that happened and that concerned you. You looked around and saw Cas sitting on the edge of your bed with his face in his hands. You instantly felt bad for the angel.

"Cas?" You said, your voice scratchy like you had been screaming for weeks. You cleared your throat in an effort to fix the problem.

He looked at you with wide eyes. "H-how..? I thought you were..." He trailed off and you crawled over to him and gave him a hug. It really looked like he needed it. He hugged you back immediately and you smiled.

"How long was I out?" You asked after you pulled away.

He looked at the floor and sighed. "A week."

Your eyes widened and your mouth opened on its own.

"I thought I killed you," He said, his voice full of regret. He fixed his gaze on you, and his eyes screamed that he was sorry.

"How would you have killed me?" You were confused about the entire situation.

"You were having a panic attack and I wasn't thinking clearly so I wasn't paying attention to what I was doing. I thought I killed you instead of putting you to sleep." Cas explained with a sad expression on his face.

"Oh, it's okay, Sweetie. I'm here now, aren't I?" You asked and he nodded. You slowly leaned in and pressed your lips to his softly. He didn't know what to do so he just stayed frozen. You pulled away and giggled. "Just copy me, okay?"

He nodded and you pressed your lips to his, once again, This time he kissed you back as he tried to mimic your movements. You grabbed his shirt and he cupped your face in his hand. He didn't realize that his eyes were open so he quickly closed them and acted upon what he could feel instead of what he could see.

Once you pulled away, you opened your eyes and looked at him, only to see the most beautiful smile on his face. You smiled and laughed, feeling like your stomach was exploding from everything that had happened within a few minutes. His smile was beautiful, his eyes were beautiful, he was beautiful. On the inside and on the outside.

"Thank you, Y/N, for helping me to see what I've missed all this time." He said and you tilted your head with a smile still plastered across your face.

"What do you mean?" You asked him, confusion lacing through you.

"I love you, Y/N." He looked over at you and your jaw dropped to the floor.

"W-what?" Your eyebrows were furrowed and your mouth was agape.

"I love you. I didn't realize that until now." He explained and your heart just about stopped as his words sank in.

"I l-love you too." You said, without even thinking about what you said. It just slipped out of your mouth.

He smiled and you felt the urge to hug him again, so that's what you did. You tackled him in a hug, causing him to fall back into the mattress. You giggled and kissed his cheek as you stood up.

"Never mind." You jumped on him again and hugged him, practically squeezing the life out of him because you never wanted to let go. That was how the rest of the afternoon went. You and Cas hugging and occasionally sharing a kiss as you relaxed in each other's arms. It sounds cliché but it was all you needed to forget about everything that had happened on the hunt. It was perfect.

Sorry guys. I'm going through a phase of really really really wanting to hug Cas so... Idk. Deal with it? Anyway, This took me about 2-3 hours to write and it was actually really fun so I hope you like it! I love you guys! Stay beautiful!

-Ellie