Lutteoficweek

A million lights

For the Tumblr Lutteoficweek 2018, Day 4

This was written in an hour but I hope you still like this!

///

"Hey ho, chica delivery!"

He enters the flat to his roommate spread out on the whole couch, munching popcorn as a Netflix show he never heard of but that she's obsessed with flickers over the TV screen.

She looks at him too surprised for the fact he explicitly told her where he was going and when he'd be back. "Oh, Matteo, um, hi."

"You seem surprised by my presence. May I remind you that this is my flat and you moved into my free room and that I told you I'd only go for a drink or two?"

Unsurprisingly, she rolls her eyes at him while she presses Pause. It's her favorite reaction to almost everything he says and although they don't live together for long, it feels more familiar to him than most classmates he met two years ago.

She shrugs. "To be fair, I never met anyone who said that and actually came back after two drinks." Not even glaring at him anymore, she slightly waves the remote control at him. Honestly, he's tipsy, however, he's not dumb. He takes the hint and turns to leave, when out of nowhere, a loud rumble echoes through the flat.

Matteo jumps.

It's a reflex, just like the little scream he lets out, just like the confused look Luna sends him.

"It's just the thunderstorm they announced for tonight, relax," she says, frowning.

"Yeah, sure, alright, all good. I'll go to bed now." He'd come off as casually if it weren't for the stupid whine his throat releases as lightning dances in front of the window.

"Matteo, you can't be scared of a thunderstorm," Luna stops him before he can leave and save the rest of his dignity, and it doesn't help that it sounds more like a question than an amused remark. "Would you feel better if I held your hand?"

Another roar from the dark clouds, along with too many lights breaking through them. His heart stops. Picks up its rhythm, picks it up faster. His answer – yes, it would – lingers on the tip of his tongue. But then he sees the smirk her mouth wears, and he has to fight the urge to bury his head in his hands. Of course she's joking, this is probably her payback for all the teasing he puts her through. He's not in the mood, though, he just wants to hide under his blanket and wait until his vision blacks out, until the lights and thunder disappear.

So, instead of accepting the challenge in her eyes, he shrugs and goes to his room.

///

One, two, three, four, five, six, seven – pause – one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight.

One, two, three...

A knock on the door interrupts his desperate attempt to control his breathing. "Matteo?"

A second knock, this time louder. "I can literally hear how stressed you are, and I'm sorry I made fun of you, that wasn't cool and," he can't understand whatever she says next over the thunder, "Just let me help you. Please."

He doesn't trust his voice enough to answer.

Instead, he forces himself to get up and stumble to his door. The mirror on the wall reveals messy hair and stains the sweat left on his whole shirt, but Matteo has no energy to care about how he looks.

"Oh my..." Luna whispers the instant he opens the door, then covers her mouth with her hand. Her eyes wander through his room, over him, then to his bed. While she struggles for words, he supports himself against the doorframe.

"Okay, this is bad," she finally states before she shoves him back to his bed. More thunder, more muffled winces into his pillow.

The mattress gives in under the weight of Luna sitting down. Next thing, Matteo feels her hand on his back, carefully stroking it. "Okay," she says, "Here's a deal. I'll help you."

"But?" he utters into his sheets.

"You have to say one nice thing to me."

He tilts his head. Luna smiles, almost shyly, which is new, and he wants to look at it for a bit longer but the storm outside has no intentions of giving him a break and so he closes his eyes again.

"What?"

"You never said anything nice to me." Again, her hand on his back in light patterns. For a moment, he confuses the thunder for his heartbeat.

"Because I'm afraid I won't stop," he whispers.

"Wait, what?"

Matteo sighs. The remains of the cocktails and the anxiety rattling his bones knock out his brain, switch off all self-control and suddenly, he's just talking.

"You want to hear something nice? Well, Luna, then I'll tell you something nice. Your eyes are the most beautiful green I've ever seen. The sound you make when you think something is super hilarious makes me want to laugh too and your smile is so bright I feel warm every time I see it, like a million lights shine inside you and you share it as if it doesn't cost you anything. You are the kindest person I know, I have no idea how you do it, but I feel there is nothing you wouldn't do for your friends. And you're really cute when you sing under the shower and..." He stops himself. And I really want to kiss you.

She stares at him in an intensity no storm he ever lived to see has reached. Maybe thunder and lightning run through her veins too, and not only turn the sky into a world-ending spectacle.

"I... eh. What?"

He winces, and it's not only because of the grumbling outside. He shouldn't have started, he should've stuck to what he knew and what was safe, but he started and like he had feared, he couldn't stop spilling out truth after truth until there was nothing left inside of him.

With both hands, Luna brushes her hair out of her face, then takes a deep breath. "Okay, alright. Wow. Um. We can talk tomorrow, I guess? For now I'm just... I'm gonna," she shakes her head, gives up.

At first, he's afraid she'll leave him alone now, but before the thought passes through his head, she already lays down and presses her body to his.

Matteo soaks in a breath.

He has absolutely no clue what she's trying to do, and if it's the one cure against his anxiety or the worst nightmare causing it. Her arms cling on to him, her hands roam his hair and back simultaneously, and her face... her face is too close to him, for heaven's sake. Her breath dances over his cheek. It's too much, his brain decides it can't handle this anymore.

After that, Matteo just feels. Feels the soft strokes, the warmth of her skin. Feels the shiver over his spine as she hums what he guesses to be Mexican lullabies.

Feels safe, and warm, and sleepy.

///

She's still by his side when he wakes up to sunshine leaking through his curtains.