I'm not sure if this chapter makes sense or if you can relate (because what Troye is feeling in the beginning, I can definitely relate to... Idk if it made sense though, I just wrote it out...) or if you even want to read this chapter because it sucks and there are way too many chapters that happen in Tyler/Troye's heads but hopefully this is okay...
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Troye POV
Do you ever get the feeling of wanting to have another chance... Be friends with people you know you hate?
You know that they've hurt you, made you feel like shit and made you cry a river... But you still want them?
Just the fact that you know they could be different, the fact that they weren't always like that making you want to hold on?
Maybe it's because you've known them for a long time.
Because they seemed trustworthy. Believable. Like they actually cared.
Maybe it's because it feels like they still do.
Maybe because you loved them.
Like the unexplainable smudges on a brand new canvas, they will always be there somehow. No matter how hard you try to avoid them.
You remember the memories, happy and sad,
And you just regret, somehow, that you have really lost them, your mind unable to take the fact that they are gone...
No matter how much you dislike them, you can't forget them, and they have left a permanent scar in your heart.
Every. Breath. You. Take. Opens. Part. Of. The. Scar.
It's weird how you know that you should be happy, and on most days you are, laughing and forgetting everything.
But it's also on those days that everything can hit you the hardest.
Everything from the good to the bad.
You don't know which is worse...
No matter how hard you try, you can't forget them.
And the harder you try, the more you remember.
So I just wrote that, planning to put that as part of the actual chapter but then I was like nah that doesn't really make sense... (Sorry 'bout my bad english haha) but I'll just leave it there because I think it sums up Troye's feelings about Tyler pretty well.. If you don't like it... Too bad :( I tried.
We pulled up next to a cute little cafe. That's when I suddenly realised that this could turn out really bad. Even though I had only came out to Tyler, everyone soon found out when we stopped being friends.
It was a really sad time for me.
Most of our mutual friends had stayed with Tyler, especially the boys, and there was a rumour that I was going out with Joey. thinking about it, that's where Tyler probably got that idea. We were good friends... But we weren't ever anything more.
"Why are you crying?" I could hear Sawyer's voice, but I couldn't see him properly. Tyler whipped around immediately at the words, studying my face and looking at me sympathetically. I hadn't even realised that I was crying until he had mentioned it. I rubbed my eyes with my fingers, childishly working it like car windscreen wipers.
"Nothing. I'm fine." I say weakly, putting on a fake smile.
We entered, Sawyer's arm draped around my shoulder and Tyler standing alone, third wheeling awkwardly. Little bells chimed, alerting everyone in the cafe of our presence. I felt a bit intimidated by all the stares that everyone was giving us.
From nowhere, a girl ran out to us a hugged Tyler. I could only see a blur of brown and blonde. She looked at me, and it wasn't anyone I remembered.
That was a relief.
"Hi, my name is Zoe. Nice to meet you!" Her voice was very bubbly and cheerful. She had a very petite body and big blue eyes.
She put out a hand I shook it.
Her eyes were full of mirth as she said,"What's your name?"
I nearly groaned out loud at my awkwardness.
"Troye. With an e."
"Okay, well nice to meet you,"
She narrowed her eyes slightly at the way Sawyer had pulled me tighter towards him, as if he was telling her to back off. Or maybe it was at me. How I didn't have the same look of love that he had. I didn't know what I felt towards Sawyer. I was scared of being used, not to forget that he wasn't exactly my type...
But it was nice to feel loved.
She walked to our table, and the three of us trailed behind her. My heart was beating faster and faster with each step, nervous of who I was going to meet.
There weren't a lot of people, and I did a quick scan of the table, sighing audibly when I didn't see anybody I recognised.
But apparently someone recognised me.
"Troye?"
Hello lovely people :)
I'm back with another chapter which I hope you liked.
I don't have much of an excuse but I was sick and blocked from this... Sorry.
I just wanted to mention one thing and that is the virtual hug chain that Vicki and I want to start. Basically, I've noticed that some people aren't feeling 100% lately and that makes me unhappy so this is Vicki's idea to make people feel better! What do you think?
OKAY SO THANK YOU MUNCHKINS FOR EVERYTHING THAT YOU HAVE DONE, ILY BYE <3
