Fooling Myself (ONE SHOT)

PROLOGUE

A continuous wind flashing through my face as I face the sunset towards the sea. The waves was bumping my lower legs as I stood still with my sinking feet on the sand.

I stared on the water not far infront of me and saw some seaweeds floating everwhere. I hate those things that will touch my skin.

Looking far infront of me, people enjoying the warm water up upon their chest. Seeing them happily playing with the waves, splashing water with the one they love.

I glanced at my back and saw children happily playing with their playmates, enjoying the 1 foot cold water.

I looked furthermore at my back and saw the shore, where all people came from.

I faced the sunset, again. I stared as the memories flashed back before my eyes. Those happy memories that I treasured the most. I looked up the sky above me when I felt some water leackage trying to escape my eyes. A drop of my tears escaped and fell down my neck until the wind dries it all up.

Someone caught my attention as she screams for help. She is drowning further than where the people enjoying theirselves. She's  trying to swim back, but she can't.

I bet she can't swim. Even swimmers drown when they're in bad shape. Everyone stared at her, but none of us would bravely run and save her from drowning. Until a man came and pulled her away from that deep part of the sea.

Then I have this teary eyes again. I stared down at my right side and saw nothing but water. Until my tears dropped down the water. Everyone has associates, exept for me. I have no one . .

.
Loving a person is like the sea. All came from the start, until you stepped forward enjoying the childish love. Until you reached the point where you're standing between the seashore and the sea itself, scared of the obstacles on reaching the matured love and enjoy the company of the one you love. But if you go furthermore on the deep sea without someone you are with, you'll make yourself drown.

Life is a choice, and so was love.

I am at this part of my life where I stand still in the middle. Hesitating to step forward scared on the obstacles in life and scared to drown if I go beyond more than the limit. I wanted to enjoy just like them. But I hate tests.

I wanted to be happy. I wanted to be with someone. But that someone, was happily enjoying his self with someone else. And so I was left alone here in the middle with no one to lean on. I don't know what to do nor how to move.

Because,

If I move forward, can I pass through those obstacles and can be happy like the others?

Or if I step backward where I came from, can I be happy alone?

Or just stay still to where I was, where my feet was sinking. If I stay here forever, I would sink on the sand and drown without making a step, without putting some effort trying my best to be happy. Would it be enough? Would it be worth it?

Stepping backward was too far away from the start, it's tiring. Staying would kill me slowly. And so the only positive way is to move forward, do something. And to not reach the limit.

But how could I do that if I'm afraid of everything?

Especially, afraid to be hurt again...

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