Hold On ☀ Wyatt Oleff

Chapter Eight: Hold On, I Still Want You...

TRIGGER WARNING FAM 13+

Allison's POV (short)

I looked over the other side of the room, on the small drawer by my bed. I spotted a sharp fruit knife... sharp...

I stood up wiping the tears on my face and took it.  I sat on my desk and took out a piece of paper and scribbled out words.

But what should I write? Apologize? But for what? I didn't do anything to them. Should I like, make it like 13 Reasons Why but with letters? Writing each person I know a letter of how they made me do this? Okay that'll be weird. I'm just going to write one to mum.

   Dear mum

I know what you're thinking. "Why did you do this?"

Life. My answer is life. 

But I'm still sorry. Because the tears that's running down your face right now is because of me. Because of me you can't see your beautiful daughter again. 

If you're thinking this is anyone's fault, think again. It's no ones fault. Just the fact that life crushes me into pieces. 

I could be brave, but braveness isn't something for someone like me. I was brave today but regretted it. Two times. One right now as I'm writing this letter and one because I got suspended for cursing in the hallways and slapping a kid. I regretted both. Still regretting it. Are you proud of your brave rebel?

I felt a tear run down my cheek from the last thing I wrote.

My point in this letter is that life is for the brave. People who won't get easily triggered and sad. I'm not. I'm weak. I'm different. And the world isn't somewhere for people like me. 

I'm sorry for this. But if you ever miss me, look into the sky. If it's day, I'm there jumping on the clouds. If it's night, I'm reaching for the stars. I'm always here. Remember me.

I folded the paper and took the knife. I walked to the bathroom in my room and closed the bathroom door. I put the paper on the small space in front of the mirror. I looked at my reflection in the mirror. No words can explain how I'm feeling right now.

I took a deep breath and put the knife on my wrist. Here goes nothing.

One cut...

Two cuts...

Three cuts...

Four...

I was sobbing as the blood was taking over the floor as I felt my mind blacking out. Someone burst in and yelled my name... 

Remember how I wrote I regretted being brave? Now I regret being weak... 

A/N: I remember the time I wrote how Daniel Seavey went to heaven resorts. I was a stupid child don't make fun of me *sniff* it will hurt my feewings ;(

Wyatt's POV

I saw the frown on her face before she shut the door. It was the same frown me and Finn saw on Millie's face the day she commit suicide

I don't know what came over me causing me to care. Something in me sparked telling me I had to follow Allison home. 

After two minutes I looked around to see if that boy and kid Allison was talking to are around. Let's hope her mother will let me in.