Chapter Fifteen

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This chapter is all in Xavier's POV and how he's struggling to get to Amanda.
Xavier's POV
I'm on the bus listening to music, WiFi is on my lap sleeping, I hold my necklace in my hand and just thinking about Amanda. She just won't leave my mind, maybe if she won't leave my mind maybe she was meant to stay there. We're about half way and the bus stops, we got a flat tire, great. I grab my stuff and WiFi, we start walking south. I call a taxi and the pick us up, who knew taxis still exist. I grab WiFi and get in the taxi. He asked me where I'm heading; "I'm heading to my best friend's house, she lost her memory and I want her to remember me" he was saying that's stuff, just giving me pity. It starts to rain, it hits the taxi's windows so calmly, its soothing. I look out and watch the grey clouds take over the sky, thunder fills the background sounds, lightning lights up the sky. WiFi is once again asleep, I put on my headphones and listen to music. My thoughts run across my mind. The taxi pulls over, he's saying he can't drive in this weather, we got to wait it out. It's 3:33am on a Saturday, I decided to take a small nap. I wake up and we're moving again, it's 6:30am, I stretch a bit and pet WiFi. He took him for a walk, it was nice of him. I take out my phone and check it. Twenty-five missed calls from Mom. One hundred messages from Mom. Jeez, it's not like I'm staying forever, they don't understand what it feels like, to be forgotten, to be not wanted, to be useless, they don't know. It hurts, it really does. I was diagnosed with clinical depression, a while back, that's why I need Amanda. She's the only person that cares about me anymore, and if I'm forgotten, I may suffer from a deep depression. It's hard, and it sucks. Living with it, is not fun, taking pills everyday, trying not to do things to harm yourself, trying not to explode into different emotions, trying to contain all of them, just everything, it's really hard. You feel all alone everyday, even though you know you're not, you feel useless and you're not, you feel unwanted when you're wanted, the most toughest part is to act like you're happy even though you're not, at all. I struggle a lot with it, Amanda always helped with it, that's why I didn't want to leave. This is my fault, if I stayed this wouldn't have happened. We stop, it's Amanda's house, I pay him and gave him a tip, I grab everything and walk to the front door, I ring the bell. I'm here Amanda, I'm finally here.

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