An Expectation

10

Lewis had been kind, of course, and there was the incident with Stewart, but did she love him? Not at all. They were friends! Honestly- it was a little nauseating.

So Marion put away the letter, glad that Lewis had left that morning without much fuss. She'd do nothing about it.

*****

It was a hot afternoon in late July when the news came.

"I'm sorry, Mr. Abbot..." began the doctor.

"What is it?" asked Lady Abbot, clutching her son's hand. 

"You're never going to be able to do hard labour."

"That's it?" asked James, relaxing.

"Mr. Abbot, do you play any sports?"

James shrugged. "I enjoy a football match every once in a while. Haven't played since I was on France before the bombing, though."

The doctor paused. "The pneumonia took a very heavy toll on your lungs. A football match... would not be a wise choice."

"Oh," whispered James. "Oh."

His mother sensed that James wanted to be alone. "Thank you, doctor," she said curtly. "Is that all?"

"Yes, ma'am," he said. "And I am sorry."

"It's not your fault," replied James. "I don't wish to shoot the messenger."

His mother looked at him with sympathy, then turned to the doctor. "I'll show you out."

*****

"Are you allowed out, James?" 

He looked up from the garden bench to see Marion. "I've improved enough," he said simply.

Her brow furrowed. "Something's wrong. What is it?"

He just looked down.

"Oh, James," she said, sitting down by him and holding his hand. "You don't need to tell me now, not if you don't want to."

It all came out slowly- how he had been doing so much better, and then that morning when the doctor had told him that he'd never play football again, not for a long time anyways, and how he'd never be able to lift large loads or do any sort of hard labour.

"I know you think that's stupid, me being upset about football."

Marion shook her head. "You loved to play before you left."

He clenched a fist. "I just wish I would have know that would have been my last game, before- before this." He gestured broadly to everything around him.

"We never know, do we?" 

He laid his head on her shoulder like a child. "No."

And without thinking, Marion laid a kiss on James's hair, not noticing that anyone was walking by.

*****

"Saw something strange, Marion, when I was walking in the garden earlier," began tall, intimidating Nurse Bellamy in a disapproving tone. Next to her, another nurse (her first name was Claudia, but Marion didn't know her last name) tittered awkwardly, with laughter that was almost cruel.

Marion closed the kitchen door behind her and went to the cupboard. She said nothing.

"Are you supposed to marry him?" 

Marion froze. "We're not engaged, if that's what you mean," she said, knowing that the nurse was referring to James. She pulled out the syringes and needles she needed and began to search for the heroin solution to fill them.