Shepard of Fire (COD BO2 Fanfic)

The Doctor's Mind

Chapter 16.

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Tessa's POV:

My lungs burned, and my body ached. But I continued to press on, knocking the heads off another five walkers that sauntered towards me. The hoards had become relentless recently, hundreds more than usual pushing through our barriers. My legs pushed foreword, carrying my body through the Fire Room into the Alley. My heart pounded, and I stopped for a moment, my hands catching on my knees as I pressed against the wall. As I waited for my breath to return to my body, I heard the earsplitting squeal of a runner. I fumbled with my M40 as it sprinted towards me, gurgling puss from it's rotted out mouth. I had barely cocked my gun as it came within arms reach of me. I flinched, squeezing my eyes shut. There was a slight pinging sound, followed by the feeling of spray and a gurgling moan. I opened my eyes, seeing the creature headless on the ground in front of me. Edward stood in the doorway, scoffing at it as he composed himself and came to my side. "You must be more careful, liebe." I avoided his eyes, nodding silently. My mind had recently wandered to his words from that night. His calloused fingers came to my chin, lifting my head to meet his eyes. "Vhat is zhe matter?" I shook my head, then brushed his fingers away from me. I picked up my fallen gun, then began to plod towards the door to the Generator Room. His rough hands stopped my, seizing my arm. "Vhat is zhe matter?!" He screeched, his fingers squeezing my skin. "Nothing." I muttered, tugging on my arm. He held it firmly, then yanked my body back, pressing my back to the doorframe. "Do not lie to me, Tessa. Somezhing is on your mind. Now tell me, vhat is it?!" He growled, his face inches from mine. My hand reached up, wrenching his fingers from my arm. "It's just...." My breath caught, "I don't understand why I can't love you." I murmured, barely audible. His eyes widened, "So tell me now! Why is it a bad thing that I love you?" He remained silent, and stepped back. "Nien." He whispered, before turning to disappear back into the Fire Room. Tears pooled in my eyes, and I turned to duck into the Generator Room. I sprinted through, knocking out any zombies that came into my line of vision. Bursting through the doors of the Stage, I ran right for the mane of blonde hair with a swollen belly. I latched onto Holly, causing her to jump. Burying my face in her neck, I wept quietly, my shoulders shaking with sobs. "Tess? Hey, hubby, what wrong?" She asked, her arms wrapping around my shoulders to comfort me. I shook my head, and continued my quiet fit. She cooed me, petting my head like I used to do with her. The rough sound of a Russian man, a muffled Marine, and the soft sound of Kelsie's voice faded as I focused on calming myself. My sobs quickly secede, and I pulled my head out of Holly's neck. "Thanks.." I mumbled, rubbing my eyes. "What happened?" She asked, worry painted onto her expression. I sighed, "Well, apparently, it's a bad thing for me to love him." I whispered, wanting the words to only be heard by her. Her brows furrowed, and her jaw clinched. "So, that quack hurt you?!" She growled quietly. My gaze fell to the floor, "I don't understand him. And he won't tell me anything." I murmured. She nodded, anger still held in her eyes. "Want me to talk to him?" She suggested, I shook my head. "That'll end bad." I sighed, "I'm just gonna wait for him." I muttered, then took my leave towards the Saloon, hoping to find some Schnapps to dull my racing thoughts.

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It was many hours later that I finally left the Saloon. I had failed to find anything, besides stashes of Nikolai's vodka. I settled for snatching a bottle, moving the others around to look like nothing was missing. With the cool bottle in my hot hand, I slowly plodded towards the Balcony. The second I entered the room, an earsplitting scream erupted from the edge of the room. German curses, and screams where clumped thickly with rough sobs. I ripped my head around, seeing Edward crumpled in the corner. He was crouched, his head on his knees, his hand entangled in his loose hair. I ran to his side, "Edward! What's wrong?" I begged, watching his body lurch and convulse in agony. He was pale, and his eyes seemed to be fixed on the floor. Hot tears trickled down his cheeks, and his mouth hung open as he hyperventilated. I reached out, wrapping my arms around him. I held his head to my chest, doing all I could to comfort him. His body tensed, and his fingers gripped mercilessly onto my sides. I ignored the quickly increasing pain, hold him as close to me as possible. I stayed quiet, and felt his body jerk in my arms. Slowly, he relaxed into me, and his breathing became steady and ragged. "Tessa...?" He murmured. I nodded against his head, pressing soft kisses to his scalp. "Bitte, Tessa. Machen Sie sie zu stoppen." He begged. My mind raced through all the German I had learned through the years. "Make what stop?" I asked quietly. His eyes pleaded for me, and his grip on my sides became tighter, his nails digging into my flesh. "Zhe voices... Make zhem stop... Zhey von't leave me be..." I realized what he meant. This wasn't any kind of physical breakdown. This was mental sickness, Edward was suffering from an illness that attacked his mind. His hands suddenly yanked me down to him, his lips crushing to mine. I let him melt into me, and felt him calm a bit more. "Zhey seem to go avay vhen I am near you." He whispered against my lips. He released me, sitting back to lean against the wall. I watched him, as he returned to his normal composure. "Do you now see vhy you cannot love me?" He said, running a hand through his sweaty hair. I leaned foreword, burying me face into his chest. We lay there for what seemed like hours, and eventually his hands trailed up to hold me to him. "I vas infected by zhe MPD's pover vhen I touched zhe machine, and since zhat day, zhe voices have infected me as vell." He had told me of the MPD before, and it's purpose in everything around us. I pressed closer into his chest, breathing in his scent. "I don't care." I said loudly, earning a grunt of surprise from him. "You don't care zhat I constantly hear voices zhat tell me to kill all around me, even you? You don't care zhat I am occasionally overwhelmed by zhem? You don't car zhat zhere is a possibility I could snap and kill you at any moment?" I sat up, now straddling his crossed legs. "No, I don't. Loving someone isn't a choice, but it comes with responsibilities. I love you, so it's my job to take you as you are! It's my job to love you no matter what you hear, say, or even do! I love you! And no risk, or MPD is gonna change my mind!" I stated loudly. He was quiet for a while after that, staring at me intently. I expected him to push me away, to leave me like he did the last time. Instead, he pulled my body into his, stroking my head. Edward kissed my scalp, "Danke, liebe." He murmured, and held me close. "Ich liebe dich auch, Tessa." He whispered, holding me tight. I felt hot tears trickle down my cheeks, and I pressed my face into his neck, "Ich werde dich immer lieben, Edward." I whispered, feeling the calm of sleep wash over my body.