𝗕𝗲𝗮𝗻𝗼 Shorts

❀ Wonderland - 2

James sighed, but smiled in spite of the lump forming on his head and his swelling nose. "It's alright," he said in a cheery voice that didn't match his injuries the way it should have. "Nice of you to drop in!"

Dennis waved and turned to go, reviewing the many tunnels that branched from the bottom of the hole. On second thoughts he span back to the pair. "You haven't seen the Whizz Rabbit, have you?" He asked.

James nodded. "Yes-"

The 'S' sound had hardly been finished when a cloud of dust emerged from one of the tunnels.

"There he is!" Dennis said, leaping to catch the rabbit's legs.

James howled as the rabbit trampled over him, just as he was about to peel himself off the floor. Dennis landed flat on the floor with a thump, missing the rabbit by at least a few seconds.

"He went thataway!" James said blithely, pointing down a tunnel.

Dennis scrambled to his feet and set of in pursuit. "Thanks!"

After a five-minute walk through the meandering tunnel, Dennis emerged into the light again. A good thing too - he was already tired of tripping on tree roots and sinking his feet into puddles in the dark.

The wood this side of the rabbit burrow was pretty much the same as the other side. A sundial held up by a small urchin stood to one side, and some squelchies were gathered around.

"'Tis a gathering of squelchy toves gyring and gimbling in the wabe!" The urchin said, then blew a raspberry. Dennis ignored him and walked on.

A little ways on, Smiffy trotted up to Dennis and shook his own hand. "Hello, I'm the Mad Nutter!"

Dennis rolled his eyes towards the sky and regarded Smiffy cynically. "That should be Mad Hatter, you twit. What are you doing here?"

Smiffy beamed and gestured around himself. "I'm gathering nuts in May!"

Dennis sighed at the daft boy's apparent idiocy. "You don't get nuts in May - you get them in autumn," he explained slowly.

Smiffy's eyebrows knotted together, and he couldn't get them undone. He decided instead to run head-first into a tree, like a deranged charging bull.

"Well I never - he is the Mad Nutter!" Said Dennis with astonishment.

Smiffy collided with the tree, making the tree quiver. The daft boy was physically sound after the blow, and Dennis was too until the tree above them started shedding nuts and bolts.

Dennis covered his head with his hands, wincing at the little hail-like pains. "And you d-do get nuts in May!"

Smiffy stood triumphantly and swallowed a nut whole. "After I eat these, I'll be the Mad Fatter," he explained, "but I'll do exercises and soon be the Mad Fitter!"

Dennis shook his head at Smiffy and barked his pain when a bolt hit his knuckle. "And I'll be the Mad Flatter if I stay here," he muttered, edging away from the tree until he could slip away from both the falling nuts and the nutcase.

The problem was, he couldn't see a path, and without it he was entirely lost.

Jadis popped out from behind a tree and examined her nails, now done green to set off her eyes. "Need help?" She asked.

Dennis, who hadn't noticed her appearance, startled and then let out a frustrated noise as he turned upon her. "Not you again!"

"Can't put up with my dazzling beauty?" The girl asked, making an over-exaggerated pose.

"Or your bad pick up lines," Dennis quipped, irked.

She cocked her head, stepping towards him. "Know what other lines I deal in?"

Dennis didn't catch on. "No?"

"Palm lines."

"Alright, then." Dennis smirked. "Read mine."

Jadis smiled, the kind of smile a cat wears when it knows it's caught the canary, then she fashioned it into a careful mask of thoughtfulness. "Hmm. Which is your dominant hand?"

Dennis' triumph - from thinking he had caught her out - dissipated. "My right," he answered carefully.

Jadis held out her hand. "Then give me your left," she said.

He held out his left hand and she took it, turning it palm-up in her cupped hands and running her thumbs over the thick padding of his inner hand. Her skin was soft and warm against his.

She hummed softly in assent to something, and Dennis peered first from her hand, to his hand, then back again, curiosity taking over.

"What is it?" He blurted after the fourth hum.

Jadis looked up, her expression the epitome of seriousness, and said: "Your heart line says that you will call me soon."

Dennis barked a laugh. "What?" He said incredulously.

"Don't make me repeat myself," she chided.

Dennis pulled his hand away from her soft fingers and waved a dismissive hand at her. "Forget it."

"That's no way to say 'thank you'!"

Dennis lifted a hand as he walked away in a random direction, not even turning around to see her fold her arms.

"Karma will pound upon those who harm the righteous!" She shouted after him as he disappeared among the trees.

Dennis laughed quietly as he stalked off. "Karma?" He shook his head. "What a charlatan."

No sooner than he said it, a pair of fangs glinted white in the shadow of a tree. Dennis called out in shock as the fangs were joined by a full mouth of sharp teeth.

"What's this?" He asked, backing away. As he spoke, a pair of yellow eyes materialised.

Dennis bumped into something solid and turned around quickly, to be met by the sight of Frankie from Number 13.

"That's Tiddles, the Cheshire Cat," Frankie explained, pointing at the disembodied teeth - which were now attached to a tiger.

"And this is Sabre, the Berkshire Brick!"

Frankie let Sabre to the floor (dropped him) and Sabre landed on Dennis's foot. It caught him unaware, and he didn't have time to move his foot out of the way of the heavy brick.

"Argh!" Dennis yelled, wrenching his foot out from under Sabre and hopping, clutching it tightly.

Frankie picked up Sabre and produced a paint brush from no where, beginning to paint the brick.

"I'm painting Sabre. Maybe he'll get a part in the Yellow Brick Road!"

Dennis scowled and gingerly let go of his foot, wincing as he put it down. "Wrong story," he said with a rueful grin.