His Love, My Home. [COMPLETED]

You or Me

"Am I banned from here too or not yet?" I said as I slightly let myself into Alexander's office. He was busy with a lot of files and papers in front of him, and I could say that he was really shocked of my presence. "Come in Ivana" he sighed. "Alex I need—" I wanted to explain until he cut me off. "I don't want to talk about anything Ivana. You do yourself and I do mine, other than that I don't have anything to discuss with you" he looked back at his papers as I immediately replied.

"Please Alex let me-"

"Stop calling my name"

"You need to listen to me fir-"

"If it is not work then I am busy"

"Alex look at me"

"I told you to stop calling my name"

I ran to the door and locked it.

"What are you doing?"

"If you won't let me talk then no one is going to do so"

"What the hell? This is my workplace" he stood up and made his way to me in front of his desk. "You ruined my life and I am not allowing you to ruin my job too Ivana, understood?" he pointed on his desk.

"You need to listen to me Alex" I squeaked.

"I said stop calling my freaking name!" he yelled as he hit his fists hard on his desk.

I covered my ears and squeezed my eyes as I started repeating "I can't hear loud voices" I complained.

He looked at how afraid I was of him, and how determined I was about staying in his office.

"I am sorry, I have some issues" he pulled my hands down slowly.

"You need to understand that I didn't stay there because I chose to, I had an accident" I complained.

He looked away from me loosening his tie. I knew that he didn't want to hear me, but I wouldn't allow myself to lose this chance.

"I know what I did was wrong, and unforgivable, but Alex-"

"Don't fucking call my name"

"Anderson died"

He stood in his place as his eyes widened up. I took out the letter that he wrote before his death.

"You now know everything Ivana. Your mother always told me that I will never be a good father for you, but I tried my best to be your man in a way. Forgive me Ivana, but I can't answer Marcello or face you at all. I am just a weak man."

I saw Alexander's eyes filled with tears after his anger started fading away.

"He shot himself right after I left. I stayed in the hospital for around 2 weeks, and I was under Marcello's care for around 4 weeks" I continued. "I am still taking my medication for—" he interrupted me.

"I know everything, don't hurt yourself" he glared at me as he placed the letter back on the table. "Rosa told me everything" he confessed.

"I know both of you hate me now" I whispered. "I just want to say that I am sorry," I said as I ran away from him and opened the door. I immediately left the company without talking to anyone. Instead, I spent the day walking around the streets of London. I took a train as usual and made my way back home, but this time was different from ever. I packed up all of my things and decided to leave Essex. Life there was no longer acceptable after I came back, Rosa was my neighbor and I wouldn't be comfortable with walking in front of her house watching her skipping me. After I was done, I turned all the lights off and opened the door to find that Alexander was standing on my porch. Silence occupied the place as I saw him looking at my bags. "Are you running again?" he asked. "I never ran Alex, I just had an accident" I smiled calmly. "Do you think that we are that stupid to believe your accident?" he joked. I didn't reply to him but instead kept smiling and turned my back to lock the door. "Ivana!" he yelled right behind me. "Please don't scream" I whispered. "Not until you stop lying. You are not running anywhere before you tell me the truth" he glared at me. "I am not lying and I never ran from anyone" I walked away from him pulling my bags behind me. In a matter of seconds, he took off the bags from my hand and threw them away. "What are you doing!" I whisper shouted. "Please! Just tell me what is wrong!" I insisted. "You will say the truth or else I swear I am burning you down Ivana!" he raged again. He took off my hands as soon as I tried covering my ears. "You are not running anywhere" he yelled even more. "I can't deal with loud voices and I am not lying!" I cried out as I opened my purse and threw all the medicines out of it. He was shocked that I was saying the truth this whole time. "I don't need to lie to anyone! Do you get it." I calmed down as I started tearing. "Please leave me alone now, you and Rosa are free to believe what you want to believe" I sat on the ground picking up all my medicines back into my purse. "Let me help you" he stated. I didn't reply to him, but instead picked them as quick as the lightning and walked away to pick my bags. "Ivana listen it is just—" he tried getting closer to me but I denied him and walked away. "Ivana I don't want you to leave again, please" he started following me as I was making my way to the street. "Ivana-" he called as I replied, "Ivana is dead, just accept that!" I turned away from him and kept on walking. I knew that he wanted to follow me back, but I was too selfish to allow him to get any closer to me. I took a cab and made my way to the airport. I couldn't believe that I was going back again to Canada but this time for a living. As I was booking to Canada, I heard someone yelling my name from a distance. "Ivana for god's sake, for my own sake, stay!" Alexander reached as he was breathing heavily. "Are you okay?" I placed my hand on his chest and felt his rapid heartbeats. "Breathe in through your nose and exhale from your mouth," I said while I was tapping on his shoulder and looking into his red eyes. "Please don't leave again Ivana, I need you," he said as he sat down on the floor in front of everyone. I bent down and tried to pull him up, as I felt it was awkward for him to do that in the airport. "Listen you need to stand up and wrap it all" I whisper-shouted. He looked at me hopelessly, with his messy long hair and his face filled up with worries, begging me again to stay.

"You know I am not going to stay in a place I am not welcomed at Al—I am not calling your name"

"Ivana," he stood up. "Yell my name out, let the whole world know what's my name while escaping your lips. Please Eve, stay with me and don't leave"

"Ma'am you need to confirm your booking," the lady asked.

"She is canceling it" Alex said while holding both of my arms. "You are, right?"

I nodded as he said that, and silently took my bags and walked away from him. He ran after me spamming me with thousands of questions. Where were you going, to whom, why, when, what's the reason behind that, for how long, and he kept on jumping in front of me as I was making my way to the exit door.

"Listen you" I finally spoke as soon as I stood to take a cab. "I am moving away from you and everyone, you and Rosa left me in one of my worst critical cases, I can't trust you again so please stay away from me" I opened the door.

"She isn't going anywhere" he closed the door and pulled me away. "You are coming with me" he begged.

"No" I replied.

"I will count to three, if you don't come, this is your fault" he dared.

"What are you going to-" I said. "One, two-" he continued. "I don't care" I interrupted. "Three" he glared at me. "My name is Alexander and this is my best friend who is traveling and leaving me and I don't want her to leave" he shouted in front of everyone. I felt the heat covering my face as I was ultimately shocked by what he has done. Two cops came and took him immediately away as he made a scene. "Listen he was just joking" I ran after the cops trying to let them leave him. "I told you don't let me count to three" he smirked as he was walking with them holding both of his arms. "Are you serious! You are going to jail probably!" I whisper yelled. "It is fine at least you will stay" he laughed. "Ma'am stay away from him or else we are taking you too," one of the cops said. "Listen you just don't get it, it is my fault, please let him out I don't have anyone other than him" I begged. Both of the cops stopped as they went to talk to another man. He was a huge tall man who I looked like a biscuit in front of him. He approached us and warned both of us to not repeat what happened or else we would get in a serious trouble. I apologized to him and then made my way to get my bags again. "Drop me back home without speaking any word" I ordered Alex as I was really angry. He didn't talk to me the whole road, no conflicts no nothing, just ultimate silence. He tried to help me in putting my bags back into the house, but I denied his help and did myself on my own. It felt good to be back home, as much as I wanted to leave, I was really devastated about leaving my own house.