You dont understand how much it hurts

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Kenzie's POV
School just got out and I'm waiting for jack by his car. When he finally gets there he drives me home and makes sure I go over to Lauren and Johnny's house.
K; bye jack thanks.
J; you need a ride tomorrow?
K; no I'll probably just take Maddie's car.
J; alright bye.
I walk inside the house and see everyone staring at me.
K; what?
L; what's with you today?
K; what are you talking about.
I cross my arms.
L; you're acting so weird! You didn't talk at lunch and you didn't meet us at the truck after school. You've like ignored us all day!
K; sorry... I just... had a rough day.
I glance at Johnny then look back at Lauren.
L; oh.. ok.
K; I'm just going to go upstairs.
I grabbed my bag and walk upstairs to the guest room.

 I grabbed my bag and walk upstairs to the guest room

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Ik their house is huge.
I quickly unpack my stuff and lay down on the bed. I walk downstairs to get a snack and see everyone looking lifeless and bored.
K; hey guys.
Everyone; hey Kenz!
K; you guys wanna go swimming?
Everyone; nah..
I shrug and walk into the kitchen. I tried. I was getting out some fruit when Johnny walked into the kitchen.
J; hey Kenz.. quick question..
K; shoot.
J; I want to ask Sofia to be my girlfriend... but I don't know how.
Ouch. That hurt.
K; and..?
J; What do I do?
K; Johnny.. take it from a girl who's had a couple boys ask her out... you call her... you ask to meet up... you kiss her passionately for no reason.. and you ask her.
J; that's perfect! Thanks Kenzie you're the best friend anyone could ask for.
He ran out of the kitchen.
K; yes because that's exactly what I want to be.
I said to myself. I sigh and put the fruit back.. instead I take out the ice cream. I grab a big spoon and walk over to the couch. I open the carton and start eating.
C; woah Kenzie who broke your heart?
K; Johnny just asked me how to ask out Sofia., then he said I was the best friend anyone could ask for.
B; damn.
L; jenzie still stands in my heart.
A; I second that. 
C; dido
I rolled my eyes.
K; give it up! He doesn't like me!
I stand up and head towards the stairs.
L; I'll never give up the truth!
Lauren called after me.
K; then stop holding on to the lie!
I called back.

It's been a month... I drive myself to school now... i don't meet them at the truck anymore... I only talk at lunch before the guys come... Johnny and Sofia are dating... still hurts... the gang still ships jenzie... and I still live with Johnny and Lauren.
It's lunch time and I'm sitting with the girls at the table.
L; Kenzie truth or dare.
K; dare.
L; I dare you to ask out Johnny.
K; what no!!
L; why not?
K; would I set myself up to get rejected? It just doesn't make sense.
L; who said he would reject you?
K; Lauren he has a girlfriend.
L; doesn't mean he doesn't like you.
K; omg Lauren! Give it up!
L; no never!
I rolled my eyes and the guys sat down.
Bra; hey girlies.
Girls(except Kenzie); hey
I gave a slight smile.
L; Kenzie just do it.
K; I said no.
I said through my teeth.
L; Kenzie.. but it's so obvious that he-
K; I said no ok?!!
I screamed at her. I grabbed my stuff angrily and walked out.

After school I drove myself home. I was sitting in my room when everyone else came home. Someone was knocking on my door. I swing the door open. It was Lauren.
L; Kenzie I'm really sorry for what happened at lunch..,
K; it's fine.
L; but why didn't you just do the dare?
K; because...
L; because what?
Tears stream down my face.
K; because you don't get it Lauren! You don't understand how much it hurts when you say those things to me! Say that he likes me or that you ship jenzie or that jenzie is real! It hurts Lauren! You know why it hurts?! Because I know it isn't true! I hurts to know that he only thinks of me as a friend! It hurts to know that he doesn't care for me the way I do for him! It hurts a lot Lauren! It hurts to listen to him nonstop talk about Sofia! I just hurts so much! That dare was just a set up to hurt more! I just couldn't let myself be hurt anymore! So I stopped talking at lunch! I drive to school early! I stopped meeting you guys at the truck! I lock myself in my room after school! I try to protect myself from the pain! But it never works! I always get hurt and I'm tired of it! You don't know how much it hurts....
She pulls me into a hug and I cry on her shoulder.

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