Desire ✔️

Part 39: Phir Ho Na Juda Yeh Vaada Raha (Never Tear Us Apart)

Sunday 7 September
New Delhi
12 noon

"Why didn't you let Mihir pick us up Raman?" Ishita sat snuggled in her husbands arms in the back of a speeding limousine.

They were on their way from the airport to a resort just on the outskirts of Delhi, where Mihir, Rinki and Ruhi waited for them.

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Flashback

Their morning had been spent leisurely.

They had woken up late, entwined in each other's arms. Ishita, safe in her husband's embrace, had looked lovingly at his beloved face as her eyes opened, marveling at just how innocent and vulnerable he looked in his sleep.

He had been so thoughtful, had done so much for her yesterday - the trip, this resort, her clothes, the singers, dancers. Everything planned for her enjoyment, designed for her pleasure.  Whereas she .... she sighed, her old insecurities rearing up. She loved him so much, and she hoped that she had not disappointed him. She wondered what he had thought of her, wondered whether she had given him as much joy as he had given her, wondered just how she had measured up against all the other women who had been in his life before her.

She had known that he was a passionate man, but last night....last night had been completely beyond the boundaries of her imagination and thought. She had learnt so much about him, but even more so, she had learnt about herself. The feelings he had invoked, the paths down which he had led, and she had willingly followed.... she would never, in her wildest dreams, have believed herself capable of such amor, such uninhibited sexual desire.

He had been so generous, so giving, so loving.... surely, it was like this  because he loved her...surely, he hadn't been this way with all those others..... "But Shagun, Ishita", her inner voice reminded her. He loved Shagun. Would he have found her wanting compared to Shagun?

She had no cause for insecurity though, he had assured her as he woke up in her arms, rightly reading the pensive look on her face.

"What are you thinking baby? Tell me" He demanded softly, as she lowered her eyes, not able to look at him.

She blushed, shaking her head, and he reached up to brush aside a stray lock, tucking it lovingly behind one ear. "What Ishita?" He insisted. " Why were you looking so worried my love? Tell me."

She took a deep breath, capturing his wandering hand in hers. "I... Raman, I don't know what... what you thought of me last night, I mean how I reacted ... I don't know what came over me, I don't know if it's normal. I don't know what you must be thinking of me..."

Her voice trailed off as he started to laugh. "Meri jaan, I don't know what you are talking about, but of course everything was normal. I'm sorry if I scared you. I hadn't planned to do all that last night, I was going to take things slow, but God baby, you looked so gorgeous, I just couldn't help myself."

She shook her head again, not reassured, a slow pinpoint of jealousy burning deep inside her. "But...I don't know how you liked...whether I was ..ok. I mean, you've been with so many beautiful women..."

"Hey" he interrupted her, pulling her closer. "Why are you thinking about all that, huh? I can't change my past my love, but please, believe me, I've never felt this way before . Last night....nothing has ever compared, nothing. And you, my love, you...." he shook his head in amazement, as she colored and sat up hurriedly, pulling a sheet around her.

"Mein ..woh...bathroom" she murmured, getting off the bed, wrapping the sheet tightly around herself.

"Wait, shhh, just wait, meri jaan" he stood up and gathered her into his arms from behind, holding her close until she relaxed against him. "You're my wife, you have every right to ask me anything you want. But Ishita, you don't have to compare yourself to anyone, to worry about anyone. You're an amazing woman, Mrs Bhalla, and you have no idea what you do to me, or how much I love you."