Desire ✔️

Part 61: Tum Pe Marna Hai Zindagi Apni

Sunday 12 October 2014
Continued...

The rays of the setting sun bathed the suite in its ebbing glow as she jerked awake.

She was leaning against the sofa, sitting on a soft shaggy rug. His head was cradled in her lap, his face smooth in sleep, all his worries erased, his sooty black lashes nesting on his tear stained cheeks.

Ishita rubbed her sleep riddled eyes, then looked lovingly at her sleeping husband. She slowly lifted one hand and tenderly, with infinite care, smoothed the hair on his brow. He looked so defenceless, so vulnerable, this beloved husband of hers.

He may be Raavan to the world, the suave in control alpha male, but he had shed all his inhibitions before her, had let her into his innermost soul, had laid his being, his psyche naked for her.

She continued to softly caress his head as she reflected on the past few hours...

***************************************

Raman had sunk into her arms as soon as they entered their room, his body shaking as he held her tightly, burying his face in her neck.

"I don't deserve you" he had said. "I don't deserve to be loved like this. Is pyar ka mujhe koi haq nahi hai Ishita." ( I have no right to your love Ishita)

"Hai" she had told him, caressing his back, pulling him even closer to herself. "You deserve only me and I deserve only you Raman, I love you, I love you so much"

For the next few hours, he had laid bare his soul to her, and she had done the same.

They had spoken about themselves to each other before, had opened up emotionally before. That very first night they had spent together, in the chalet in New Zealand, when he had told her about Adi. Those nights in the hospital when they had confronted their fear of losing each other.

Yet this was different. Today they had left nothing unsaid. She had been touched by the faith her husband showed, the trust he reposed in her, by opening up his darkest moments, his tortured soul before her.

He had trembled in her arms as he confided in her about how he had discovered that Shagun was cheating on him - the missed calls, cryptic messages in her phone, her careless explanations and her lies even as she set about wrecking his home. He cried as he described how he had watched his son being torn away from him; how he had wanted to die, to give up, but his crying baby, and his slowly igniting anger had given him the will to live.

They had spent the day engrossed in each other, sharing their stories, giving each other comfort. Ishita knew that they were setting the foundations for their lives together, and she knew that she had nothing to fear from this man, this relationship.

She marvelled at the many facets of her husband - the ruthless business man, the strength of his family, was today replaced by a vulnerable father, overwhelmed by his love for the child he had lost, yet determined to set things right with the help of the love he had gained.

He clung to her with a desperation that moved her soul. "It's okay Raman" she had whispered to him, over and over again. "We will do this together. Everything will be fine with Adi. With us."

He opened up to her about the nights he had cried himself to sleep, his tears soaking his pillow, or the other nights when he had drunk himself into oblivion, or sought comfort in meaningless sexual encounters that left him feeling hollow inside.

"I really thought she was the love of my life Ishita" he told her, and she had stroked his face, trying to comfort him even as her heart sank. "I thought I was finished, that I was lost forever without her."