she wasn't crazy.
his voice floated into her ears like a swan gliding on fresh morning water. she could remember that voice anywhere.
she replayed the songs. over and over and over again. it was him. it was actually him. he was on the radio, in concerts, even on television.
it was him.
was wasn't sure if she was ready to see him again. he left her, but she wanted answers. she needed them. it's been over a year and they still haven't found his father.
the car ride was long and terrorizing. he was playing only a few hours away from where she lived. she didn't know if she was going to see him, face to face. she wanted to hear his voice again, but this time, not through a screen.
it's been over a year. 382 days since she got out of the room to be exact. after long court sessions and failed attempts to track down the man with 70' looking glasses, this was the only thing she had left. him.
she had already heard of his fame. the voice once sang to her now sang to millions. although the court cases mentioned peter, she knew he would never want to see her again.
unfortunately, she felt guilty for even saying his name to the police. he didn't deserve what he had gone through, yet he had deserted her in the one moment she wanted him most.
the parking lot was filled with girls her age. some of them stared as she walked past, some even recognized her from an interview she had done with abc that came out a few months ago after the case was settled.
she guessed that they were wondering what a victim of being held hostage was at a shawn mendes concert.
shawn mendes.
she almost forgot that he went by shawn. well, at least to his fans. she wasn't sure if that was just a thing people called him, like a stage name, but in multiple interviews, he had said his middle name was peter. she liked that.
her seat wasn't near him at all. maybe when he was on the second stage, but he wouldn't see her, not even a glance. that's ok though, she wasn't ready for him to see her. would he even recognize her. it's been a year.
it was weird seeing the name shawn everywhere. his name was peter. she wanted to scream it, making sure everyone would call him by his real name.
maybe it was like their little secret. nobody but rachel calls him peter anymore.
the lights went down and screams erupted. she hadn't brought ear plugs, thinking that she was going to be ok without having any triggers. it was common for her to think about the gun held to her head, or the screams of her, replying in her head as she saw peter fall-
he was in front of her, singing a song. she hadn't recognized it at first, but as the screams died down, she knew what it was.
it was peter. he looked...happy.
he didn't need her. he was fine without her. what was she thinking? rachel, a girl he met for only two weeks, the boy who gave her hope, the boy who saved her obviously didn't need her.
she quickly exited, weaving through people as she held in her tears. they escaped as she walked in the corridors of the stadium. girls looked at her weird as she ran into the bathroom. luckily, nobody was in there.
the mirror was stained with rust on the sides. it was the first time she looked into a mirror in a while. her skin was still a bit darker from her tan she had gotten the previous summer. her eyes had bags under them, probably because she was too worried to sleep last night. her hair was a mess, and was cut to her shoulders. she chopped it off (before it was down to her waist) after she knew peter wasn't coming back.
