A/N: whaddup this was the worst birthday of my entire fuckin life gang gang also this chapter lowkey sucks so u don't have to tell me im aware i promise the next few will b better
-Two years later-
"Peter." There's a whisper from the doorway, soft and careful. It's Gamora; she's peering in at him. "It's time."
Peter didn't cry. He didn't turn to her with tear-filled eyes, he didn't burst out sobbing and he didn't cling to her like a little boy, scared and upset.
Maybe that's the worst part for him; the fact that now his whole family was dead and he couldn't even muster up a few half-assed tears. He was so, so sad, and so angry, but he'd stopped crying when he was seventeen and he's been angry ever since he lost his mother.
His mother, dead, along with the man she shouldn't have loved and the one Peter would never, ever call his father, and last of all, Peter's adoptive dad- also dead, right in front of him like the rest. Yondu was never the bad guy, Peter had realized, but this he had done too late, and now he could never go back, because Yondu had died so he could live.
"It's time." He knows she means the funeral. He just isn't quite sure he's strong enough to be there. And, god, he feels so horrible inside, everything is eating at him like flies on a long-dead animal; guilt and betrayal, anger and sadness, confusion and pure agony. It's all there, churning inside him like some fucked up thunderstorm.
The first time he met Mantis, he shook her hand awkwardly and then stepped back in surprise as she started crying. "How can you-" is all she got out before Ego interrupted her. Peter wonders what she'd do if she touched him right now. Maybe cry again. But now Peter's not so sure, because not even he can muster up tears. He's too numb.
"Peter. Come on." Gamora walks over, reaches for his hand and takes it gently, pulls him up with a carefulness that's so unlike her it almost makes him sick. "I've got it." Peter mumbles, standing up and straightening his posture. When they enter the main room, it's almost like he's with strangers; Rocket doesn't make a comment about how shitty he looks, Drax and Mantis don't laugh loudly in response, and Gamora doesn't smack Rocket's furry head. It's silent, with Yondu's body in the middle of the room.
They're all looking at him, then at Yondu, then back at him, and Peter knows they're waiting for him to speak. To his surprise, the tears finally come when he opens his mouth. His voice comes out quiet, rough, almost vulnerable.
"I'd told Gamora how when I was a kid, I used to pretend David Hasselhoff was my dad. He's a singer and actor from Earth, a really famous guy."
Drax nods, a small motion that gives Peter the strength to keep talking. "But earlier it struck me. Yondu didn't have a talking car, but he did have a flying arrow. He didn't have the beautiful voice of an angel, but he did have the whistle of one. Both David Hasselhoff and Yondu went on kick-ass adventures and hooked up with hot women. And fought robots." Kraglin's gaze is aimed directly at Peter, the same expression on his face, almost mirroring him exactly.
"I guess David Hasselhoff kinda ended up being my dad after all, only it was you, Yondu." Gamora's hand lands on his shoulder, causing him to blink, finally letting a tear fall down his left cheek. "I had a pretty cool dad."
"I guess what I'm trying to say is, sometimes that thing you're searching for your whole life," a shuddering sigh, "it's right there by your side all along, and you don't even know it."
There's silence for a moment, and then footsteps are heard; Nebula's walked out of the room and Gamora sends him a quick apologetic look. She goes after her sister, leaving the others alone, and Groot's small voice echoes through the room. "I am Groot." This earns a sad look from Rocket. "He did call you twig."
Soon after Gamora returns, they all watch as Yondu's body enters the incinerator, blue and orange and green flames dancing around his body and casting a beautiful glow in the room. Peter watches for as long as he can, head ducked and throat closed.
He turns to leave.
"Pete." He stops, and turns around, met by Kraglin, who's still standing by the incinerator. "Captain found this in a junker shop, said you'd come back to the fold someday." There's something in his hand, and it's small; Kraglin holds it out as he walks closer to Peter. "What is it?" "It's called a Zune, it's what everybody's listening to on Earth nowadays. It's got three hundred songs on it." Peter can't believe what he's hearing, and the fresh pain of the destruction of his Walkman comes back to him in this moment, reminding him of what he lost and what's right in front of him now. "Three...hundred songs?" Kraglin sniffs, nodding and looking over it. Peter gently reaches out and takes it, tracing the metal plating in his hand. Kraglin shrugs his shoulders and starts to turn away, and Peter instantly remembers.
"Wait!" He stops. Peter pulls out the arrow from his pocket, balancing it perfectly between his fingers as he holds it out to him. "Rocket grabbed the pieces and reassembled them, and I think Yondu would want you to have it." He says this with a tone of pleading, looking desperately at Kraglin and silently willing him to take it. He stares at the arrow for a moment, like he doesn't believe it, and then reaches out hesitantly to grab it. "Thanks," his voice cracks, "Captain."
Sitting on his bed, the device in his hands and dried tearstains on his cheeks, he goes through the list of songs, choosing one called Father and Son. In his opinion, it's only fitting, and it's the first song he wants to listen to on this "Zune". Letting the music start to play quietly and gently, he closes his eyes, blocking out everything around him.
There's a tiny weight on his leg and a rough tap on his arm, and he opens his eyes to see Groot, reaching up towards his headphones with wide-eyed fascination. Peter instantly reaches up to pull out an earbud, giving it to Groot and watching as he holds it to his ear. Peter's hand goes to his back, keeping him steady and holding him close for comfort.
Peter watches his eyes light up, watches as he listens to every word with a childlike excitement and holds the earbud close. Peter gives him a small smile, albeit sad. Then Groot points at the window, and Peter turns his head to see ships arriving from all directions. The Ravager fleet. Yondu's fleet.
He walks into the viewing area with the others, Groot on his shoulder. "It's a Ravager funeral." He breathes out, gazing at the dozens of colorful fireworks and looking at Gamora as Groot hops onto her shoulder. There's bursts of cornflower blue, magenta, fiery orange, greens and yellows and reds and every color Peter could ever imagine. All for Yondu.
His ashes are spreading throughout the stars, little sparks of light going back where they belong. "He didn't chase them away." Rocket mumbles. "No." Peter responds, voice thick. "Even though he yelled at 'em. And was always mean." He pauses, looking down. "And he stole batteries he didn't need." Peter realizes what he means as soon as he says this, and he turns his head to look at Rocket, eyes softening and tone changing. "Well, of course not." Rocket's head turns a bit in Peter's direction, and he knows Rocket's aware that he understands what he means.
Gamora's arm snakes around his waist, and Peter glances down at her, relaxing as he wraps an arm around her shoulder and looks out the large window.
"Bye, Dad." He whispers, quietly enough that none of the others can hear.
YOU ARE READING
Notti Insonne
Fanfiction"Peter had always been an emotional child; in fact, that characteristic would follow him into the future more than any trait his mother could have given him. This specific fact would be unfortunately decided the moment she gave birth to her little b...
