Someone New

Chapter Five

I lay in bed and stare at the ceiling. How long have I been in this same position, unwavering from my focus on the white textured ceiling? I roll over and check my phone. That's right - two days. I have been pathetically lying in bed for two days, as evidenced by the grease-stained pizza box on the nightstand and my ratty hair, which is desperately in need of a washing.

As I swipe across the screen, my eyes widen at my notifications. Twelve missed calls and seven unread text messages. I scroll through the phone, noting that one call is from my mother, one is from Cass, and the rest are from Dakota. The texts are similar, with all but two being from Dakota. Cassidy has been checking in on me, letting me know in her non-judgmental way that she's here for me if I need anything at all, and to call her when I'm finally out and about. I grit my teeth before reading Dakota's messages, my heart somersaulting into a dark place. I know they won't be pleasant.

Lexi, answer my calls. You can't just avoid me. -D

Seriously? You're really pissing me off. Answer the damn phone! -D

Lexi, I want to talk to you. I know I fucked up, but I think we need to try to figure things out. I'm willing to come back to you, but you have to meet me halfway. Call me back. -D

You know what, you're being stupid. I've been trying to get ahold of you all day. If this is how you're going to be, then fine. I'm done trying to win you back. -D

My breath hitches when I read the last message. It's the only message he's sent today so far, and I can't decide if he's being sincere, or still playing games with me.

Alexandria, I miss you. We were together for a year - why are you throwing that away? I love you, I always have. I just want to find a way that we can be together again. I know I haven't handled this very well, but you caught me off guard. I need you, I can't live without you. Will you please call me? It's important to me that you understand how I feel about this, that you try to work things out with me. I love you, Lexi. Just call me please. -D

He even put a damn heart emoji at the end of the message. This is why I have struggled throughout this whole relationship - he's hot, then cold, then hot again. I never know when I'm going to get annoyed, angry Dakota, or sweet, loving Dakota. Should I call him back and work things out? Should I turn away, hold up my middle finger, and move on with my life? I turn my phone off, telling myself that I don't have to decide anything today. Instead, I drive to Cassidy's house. If anybody can help me figure out what to do, it's my best friend.

Cassidy isn't home when I arrive, and I silently curse myself for turning my phone off without calling her back first. I contemplate doing just that, but I would really rather not find out if Dakota has messaged me anymore. I do the only other thing I can think of that could turn my mood around - I drive to the salon.

I sit through a manicure, hoping that the dusty rose color being painted onto my nails will be enough to pull me out of my desolation. When the polish has dried, I still don't feel content. I'm tired of feeling emotionally drained. For God's sake, I'm only twenty years old. Why should I already be feeling this way? Enough is enough. It's time to take back my life, and try to enjoy it on my own. Dakota shouldn't continue to control the way I feel, and I start to feel a buzz of excitement in my belly when I consider all of my options - for the first time in a long time, I feel free to do whatever the hell I want.

Dakota always loved my long, wavy hair. I once joked about chopping it off and getting a bob, and his eyes darkened and he coolly replied that if I did that, I would regret it; an understated threat that held many potential meanings.