'Cry of Fear' The Book

Chapter Two

“-I honestly don’t know how to start these things… Actually, I don’t know why I’m still writing. Well, whatever. I’ve started now so I guess I’ll continue. Doctor Purnell gave me some different pills today. Uh, ‘Citalopram’ or something. I thought this guy was supposed to be a doctor, not a moron; how in the hell does he think that giving me some pills is gonna get rid of my depression? It’s not like it's something that can be cured… I mean, I never wanted to be depressed. Who does? It's just there. And that means that no amount of drugs and painkillers is going to get rid of it. The most it’s going to do it cover it up for an hour or two and then what? I’m back to feeling shit about myself. And don't you dare tell me to get over hating everything about myself, you don't know what it's like. Imagine your life is a book. Heh, that's kind of ironic, huh? You slip up a little so you rip a page out; one useless puzzle piece of the past, free from my memory. No harm done to the story. But if you go back on the whole storyline, you'll start to notice all the bad mistakes. For me, my whole life is a fractured, dead end story. No friends, a broken family, the love of my life barely notices me, I'm covered in both physical and mental scars, I can't control my emotions and I always feel like I should just end it all. I always feel the need to rip out the pages of the past myself but... the more I reflect on the hurt, the more I hurt. And in the end I just start pulling  out pages upon pages of hate and depression enhanced memories, piling up until I just can't take any more and there's nothing I can do about it. That's not even close to the hurt that I feel inside... See, the doctors think they know how to help me but the thing is, they don't understand in the first place. Every time I cry, they give me pills. Never asking what's wrong. Every time I shout, they fight me back. Retaliating on me harder. Every time I feel like I'll say goodbye for the last time, they roll their eyes. They forget about me. They just don't see me. All of them, monsters. I'm sorry I tried...-"

(Citalopram is a drug which is used to treat depression. This means the monster most likely represents the drug which Simon was prescribed by The Doctor to treat his depression.)