A Friend's Love

Chapter Seventeen: Opportunity

I hate fighting. Of any form. I can't stand it. And I hated the fact that Jake and I had fought.

I wanted to talk to him so bad. It would be nearly impossible to count the number of times I started dialing his number, and then stopped. Half the time, I had to do something. But the other half... I just didn't know what to say.

I knew I didn't blame him. Instead, I blamed myself. Jake had made a fair point. I hadn't been spending enough time with him. And I'd kind of just pushed Alise's test results to the back of my mind so I wouldn't stress about it. But that wasn't fair to either of them.

I had reacted a little too defensively, and maybe gotten mad too fast. So... in my opinion, Jake had a right to be mad at me.

He shouldn't have accused me, cut me off, and pushed me away, but I could understand. He was exhausted, and worried about his mom. I guess he just hadn't been able to hold it in anymore. So, I didn't blame him. And I wasn't mad at him. I was more mad at myself.

And then there was Alise. She had a brain tumor. How could I have been selfish enough to forget that? I'd been so worried about Jake, and school, and my problems... and I'd forgotten about who was really important here.

So I skipped school (Yeah, yeah... I shouldn't have skipped school, but it was important! Besides, it was only one day, and my dad wouldn't care if he knew the reason behind it.) and I went over to Alise's house.

She welcomed me in, surprised to see me, but happy all the same. I was relieved when she didn't ask about Jake, because I wouldn't have been sure what to say.

Alise was thinner than she had been the last time I saw her. But not in the great, "I lost weight!" kind of way. It looked like she was losing weight because of stress. And that was unhealthy.

I saw a bottle of pills on the counter, and half a dozen empty water bottles in the trash. The house, to be honest, was a mess. There were dark circles under Alise's eyes. And... it scared me.

The first thing I did when I saw Alise, was hug her. And I didn't let go until she pried me off. My tears were falling and I was sobbing before I could even realize what I was doing. She had a brain tumor. She might die. I didn't want to lose Alise! I couldn't even stand the thought of losing her... Alise was my rock. She was crazy, sarcastic, bubbly, and never afraid to say what was on her mind. I looked up to her. She meant so much to me. How could I ever be able to stand losing her?

"Don't cry baby girl. Don't cry for me. It'll be alright." She whispered, stroking my hair. But I couldn't stop crying. Because it wouldn't be alright. How could it be?

"Listen to me Amy. Listen." I forced my eyes open to see her face. "It isn't cancerous."

I caught my breath. "What?"

"The brain tumor is beign. So, it's not cancer."

I couldn't breathe. "What about treatment?"

"I'm scheduled for surgery sometime soon. They'll be able to get rid of it. Can't you see? There's nothing to be worried about! The surgery will be fine, the brain tumor will be gone, and everything will be back to normal!"

I started to grin in relief, but then my smile faded. Because... I realized that not everything will be back to normal. Not me and Jake...

Alise smiled gently. "So... Jake told me what happened."

Another round of tears gathered in my eyes. She took me in her arms and went back to stroking my hair. "Oh Amy..." was all she said.

The next thing I knew, I was talking. And I couldn't stop.

"I don't know what happened! One second, he was mad at me, and then the next he was crying, and then the next he was yelling at me all over again! I shouldn't have just left like I did, but I didn't know what else to do... I was busy whenever he was trying to call me, but I came over right after I was done tutoring, and I was trying to be there for him...

"I'm not mad at him. I know he was tired and worried about you and stressed... I'm more mad at myself. I haven't been spending enough time with him. And I just pushed your tests results out of my mind. And that wasn't fair to either of you. I'm so sorry. And I want to talk to him so bad, but I don't know what I'm supposed to say! What if I say something wrong and screw everything up?" I choked back a sob. "Alise... what if I lose him?"

She opened her mouth to say something, but I spoke again before she could. "I... I have to do something... anything. Right now. I have to tell him."

I started to get up, but Alise pulled me back down. "Amy, think about what you're doing. You can't just march into the school and talk to him about something like this in front of everyone! Besides, what if you don't know what to say? No honey... you have to plan something."

Plan something? What could she mean by that?

"And I have a pretty good idea of what you should do..." she said, with a gleam in her eye.

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Two hours later, everything was set. My dress and mask were bought and set to arrive at my doorstep the next day. Alise had Jake's costume ready. And I knew what I was going to say.

That's right. I was going to talk to him. At the dance.

The Halloween Dance this year was going to be a Masquerade Ball. All the girls would wear ball gowns and masks. All the guys would wear suits, masks, and hats. The idea was, you wouldn't know who you were talking to, or dancing with. That way, you'd get to know everyone.

But I knew what Jake was wearing.

And he didn't know what I was wearing.

It wasn't really a plan. It was more like... an opportunity. A chance for me to say what I needed to say, and then disappear. And after he was done thinking about it, he'd come find me.

I was nervous. But I knew it had to be done. Jake needed to hear what I had to say. And I needed to say it. So now all I had to do was wait.

And I did. I waited for that masquerade. And when it came... I crossed my fingers. And I took a leap of faith.

Isn't it amazing how fast things can come together?

I think it's even more amazing how fast they can fall apart...

-Alyssa <3